The Values in a Healthy Personality . . .

If anyone knew how to itemize principles, it was the eminent psychologist Carl Rogers. An example of such is what Rogers, in his book On Becoming a Person (1961), referred to as "statements of significant learnings," and the following is just one example of those: "In my relationships with persons I have found that it does not help, in the long run, to act as though I were something I am not."

Rogers went on to discuss the need to trust the self. This is an important basis for the process of thought that will result in understanding what we are dealing with. The person, not the facts, holds the key to one's future. Facts and events do not decide conclusions; rather they carry meanings for us to discover them for ourselves.

Behaviors are conducted according to how we interpret events. Perhaps this is a basis to the flood of massive problems facing society today, which is simply a reflection of individual personalities inhabiting it. The human is results-oriented: In other words, expediency rules the day. The human is anarchistic by nature and bent toward chaos. Individual differences of interpretation is a major reason for this. Our beliefs and assumptions - the way we view things - has a major impact on the perception, recall, and interpretation of events.

The results, then, depend on our interpretation. We make decisions based on their own predictions of results, which are funneled through their own interpretations, which are based largely on past experiences, both in education and conditioning.

Our redeeming characteristics to this may our sense of community and social justice. Society, therefore, has recognized these sometimes troublesome characteristics, which have caused the formation of common moral codes, better known as law.

A healthy personality is composed of many different sides. This can often make it difficult to deal with ourselves. As Rogers reflected, "We are motivated to actualize ourselves in the reality that we perceive." In other words, we are driven by our interpretation of reality.

Therein is the problem: our individual perception.

You've heard it said, "Well, I guess we just have different values." That should not be, at least in our core values, our basic values. I'm going to list those values here. If you disagree or can add to them, please do use the comment area below and let me know. Here they are:

Love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, virtue, faith, humility, self-control.

Don't just look at these, nod your head, and go on. Work with these. Sit down with a pad and pencil and evaluate each one in your own life. First, define each one: decide what it means to you. Then evaluate where you are in life according to each value. Are you truly where you believe you should be in that area? If not, what are you going to do change it?

My grandfather once took a wise adage and repeated it in his old, charming country way: "If you keep doing things the same old way you have always done them, you'll keep getting the same old results you've always gotten."

Is this a prediction for your future? Or will you take these values and use them to change the way you interpret the facts and events in your life? This is entirely up to you. Make the right choice.