I'm jumping way off topic on this one, I realize. But I think in this case it is forgivable. These were some of the best nine minutes and some seconds I have ever spent . . .
Sincerely,
Lora
Friday, December 24, 2010
Thursday, December 23, 2010
12 Compelling Reasons to Ditch Stress from Your Life
Here is an excellent article the nutritional side of Stress I found on Mercola.com. Reproduced with permission.
In this interview, Marc David, an expert in the psychology of eating, talks about the important role stress plays in digestion.
I'm sure you received many valuable health tips from this small segment of the expert interview. To hear the full version of this and other interviews I do with world-renowned health experts is easy...
Simply sign up for the affordable Mercola Inner Circle and receive them monthly, with zero effort on your part. Take this small step -- and take control of your health – 2,250 other Mercola Inner Circle members can't be wrong!
Dr. Mercola's Comments:
This video clip of my Inner Circle expert interview with Marc David exposes the tremendous impact stress can have on your digestion, and in turn your weight and overall health.
Marc is the founder and director of the Institute for the Psychology of Eating, and has written two excellent books on this topic: The Slow Down Diet: Eating for Pleasure, Energy, and Weight Loss, and Nourishing Wisdom: A Mind-Body Approach to Nutrition and Well-Being.
The fact is, you can't separate your wellness from your emotions. Every feeling you have affects some part of your body. And stress can wreak havoc even if you’re doing everything else “right.”
What is “Stress”?
The classic definition of stress is “any real or imagined threat, and your body’s response to it.” Celebrations and tragedies alike can cause a stress response in your body. Some stress is unavoidable. Some mild forms of stress can even be helpful in some situations.
But a stressor becomes a problem when:
* Your response to it is negative.
* Your feelings and emotions are inappropriate for the circumstances.
* Your response lasts an excessively long time.
* You’re feeling continuously overwhelmed, overpowered or overworked.
It’s important to realize that all your feelings create physiological changes. Your skin, heart rate, digestion, joints, muscle energy levels, the hair on your head, and countless cells and systems you don't even know about change with every emotion.
Marc notes that Americans, in general, tend to eat under a state of stress and anxiety. While under stress, your heart rate goes up, your blood pressure rises, and blood is shunted away from your midsection, going to your arms, legs, and head for quick thinking, fighting, or fleeing.
All of these changes are referred to as the physiological stress response.
Under those circumstances, your digestion completely shuts down. So a major problem with eating while your body is under the stress response is that you could be eating the healthiest food in the world, yet you won’t be able to fully digest and assimilate that food, and your body will not be able to burn calories effectively.
How the Stress Response Affects Your Digestion and Health
The stress response causes a number of detrimental events in your body, including:
* Decreased nutrient absorption
* Decreased oxygenation to your gut
* As much as four times less blood flow to your digestive system, which leads to decreased
metabolism
* Decreased enzymatic output in your gut – as much as 20,000-fold!
Many nutrients are also excreted during stress, particularly:
* Water-soluble vitamins
* Macrominerals
* Microminerals
* Calcium (calcium excretion can increase as much as 60 to 75 mg within an hour of a stressful event)
As if that’s not enough, your cholesterol and triglycerides also go up, while gut flora populations decrease. You’re also more likely to experience increased sensitivity to food and gastroesophageal reflux, or heartburn.
But perhaps most importantly, when your body is under the stress response, your cortisol and insulin levels rise.
These two hormones tend to track each other, and when your cortisol is consistently elevated under a chronic low-level stress response, you’ll likely notice that you have difficulty losing weight or building muscle.
Additionally, if your cortisol is chronically elevated, you’ll tend to gain weight around your midsection. We’ve known for some time that body fat, and especially visceral fat (the fat that gathers around your internal organs, around your midsection) is a major contributing factor to developing diabetes and metabolic syndrome.
The bottom line?
When you eat under stress, your body is in the opposite state of where you need to be in order to digest, assimilate nutrients, and burn calories.
Everyday Stress Relief
There’s no doubt that finding ways to relieve your everyday stress is an important, if not essential, aspect of optimizing your health. All the organics in the world can’t help you if your body can’t assimilate the nutrients you put into it.
Stress is a serious factor in the illness of nearly all of the patients seen at my clinic. Because in addition to everything mentioned above, stress also plays a major role in your immune system, and can impact your:
* Blood pressure
* Cholesterol
* Brain chemistry
* Blood sugar levels
* Hormonal balance
You cannot eliminate stress entirely, but you can work to provide your body with tools to compensate for the bioelectrical shortcircuiting that can cause serious disruption in many of your body's important systems. By using techniques such as meridian tapping, you can reprogram your body’s reactions to the unavoidable stressors of everyday life.
But there are many other strategies you can employ to help you deal with stress and unwind each day, including:
* Exercise. Studies have shown that during exercise, tranquilizing chemicals (endorphins) are released in your brain. Exercise is a natural way to bring your body pleasurable relaxation and rejuvenation.
* Proper sleep
* Meditation (with or without the additional aid of brain wave synchronization technology)
I also highly recommend you read the book Feelings Buried Alive Never Die. If you’re experiencing any type of physical or emotional challenge in any aspect of your life, this book does a great job of explaining feelings: what they are, how you experience them, how they are integral to your physical health, and, most importantly, how to work with and overcome those that are pulling you down.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Hey, don't leave me in the dark! Leave a little comment here for me. Did you like it? Hate it? Do you have anything else in mind? Let me know, right here. It's very easy: just click on the "comments" link immediately below. I would love to hear from you. :)
In this interview, Marc David, an expert in the psychology of eating, talks about the important role stress plays in digestion.
I'm sure you received many valuable health tips from this small segment of the expert interview. To hear the full version of this and other interviews I do with world-renowned health experts is easy...
Simply sign up for the affordable Mercola Inner Circle and receive them monthly, with zero effort on your part. Take this small step -- and take control of your health – 2,250 other Mercola Inner Circle members can't be wrong!
Dr. Mercola's Comments:
This video clip of my Inner Circle expert interview with Marc David exposes the tremendous impact stress can have on your digestion, and in turn your weight and overall health.
Marc is the founder and director of the Institute for the Psychology of Eating, and has written two excellent books on this topic: The Slow Down Diet: Eating for Pleasure, Energy, and Weight Loss, and Nourishing Wisdom: A Mind-Body Approach to Nutrition and Well-Being.
The fact is, you can't separate your wellness from your emotions. Every feeling you have affects some part of your body. And stress can wreak havoc even if you’re doing everything else “right.”
What is “Stress”?
The classic definition of stress is “any real or imagined threat, and your body’s response to it.” Celebrations and tragedies alike can cause a stress response in your body. Some stress is unavoidable. Some mild forms of stress can even be helpful in some situations.
But a stressor becomes a problem when:
* Your response to it is negative.
* Your feelings and emotions are inappropriate for the circumstances.
* Your response lasts an excessively long time.
* You’re feeling continuously overwhelmed, overpowered or overworked.
It’s important to realize that all your feelings create physiological changes. Your skin, heart rate, digestion, joints, muscle energy levels, the hair on your head, and countless cells and systems you don't even know about change with every emotion.
Marc notes that Americans, in general, tend to eat under a state of stress and anxiety. While under stress, your heart rate goes up, your blood pressure rises, and blood is shunted away from your midsection, going to your arms, legs, and head for quick thinking, fighting, or fleeing.
All of these changes are referred to as the physiological stress response.
Under those circumstances, your digestion completely shuts down. So a major problem with eating while your body is under the stress response is that you could be eating the healthiest food in the world, yet you won’t be able to fully digest and assimilate that food, and your body will not be able to burn calories effectively.
How the Stress Response Affects Your Digestion and Health
The stress response causes a number of detrimental events in your body, including:
* Decreased nutrient absorption
* Decreased oxygenation to your gut
* As much as four times less blood flow to your digestive system, which leads to decreased
metabolism
* Decreased enzymatic output in your gut – as much as 20,000-fold!
Many nutrients are also excreted during stress, particularly:
* Water-soluble vitamins
* Macrominerals
* Microminerals
* Calcium (calcium excretion can increase as much as 60 to 75 mg within an hour of a stressful event)
As if that’s not enough, your cholesterol and triglycerides also go up, while gut flora populations decrease. You’re also more likely to experience increased sensitivity to food and gastroesophageal reflux, or heartburn.
But perhaps most importantly, when your body is under the stress response, your cortisol and insulin levels rise.
These two hormones tend to track each other, and when your cortisol is consistently elevated under a chronic low-level stress response, you’ll likely notice that you have difficulty losing weight or building muscle.
Additionally, if your cortisol is chronically elevated, you’ll tend to gain weight around your midsection. We’ve known for some time that body fat, and especially visceral fat (the fat that gathers around your internal organs, around your midsection) is a major contributing factor to developing diabetes and metabolic syndrome.
The bottom line?
When you eat under stress, your body is in the opposite state of where you need to be in order to digest, assimilate nutrients, and burn calories.
Everyday Stress Relief
There’s no doubt that finding ways to relieve your everyday stress is an important, if not essential, aspect of optimizing your health. All the organics in the world can’t help you if your body can’t assimilate the nutrients you put into it.
Stress is a serious factor in the illness of nearly all of the patients seen at my clinic. Because in addition to everything mentioned above, stress also plays a major role in your immune system, and can impact your:
* Blood pressure
* Cholesterol
* Brain chemistry
* Blood sugar levels
* Hormonal balance
You cannot eliminate stress entirely, but you can work to provide your body with tools to compensate for the bioelectrical shortcircuiting that can cause serious disruption in many of your body's important systems. By using techniques such as meridian tapping, you can reprogram your body’s reactions to the unavoidable stressors of everyday life.
But there are many other strategies you can employ to help you deal with stress and unwind each day, including:
* Exercise. Studies have shown that during exercise, tranquilizing chemicals (endorphins) are released in your brain. Exercise is a natural way to bring your body pleasurable relaxation and rejuvenation.
* Proper sleep
* Meditation (with or without the additional aid of brain wave synchronization technology)
I also highly recommend you read the book Feelings Buried Alive Never Die. If you’re experiencing any type of physical or emotional challenge in any aspect of your life, this book does a great job of explaining feelings: what they are, how you experience them, how they are integral to your physical health, and, most importantly, how to work with and overcome those that are pulling you down.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
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Wednesday, December 15, 2010
Emotions: Are We Responsible for Them?
The most basic feelings we experience include not only emotions, but motives such as hunger and sexual drive. The two phenomena (emotions and motives) are closely related. Emotions can activate and direct behavior much the same as do basic motives. Emotions may also accompany motivated behavior: Sex, for example, is not only a powerful motive, but also a potential source of joy.
Similar as they are, they need to be distinguished. The most common basis for distinguishng between them assumes that emotions are triggered from the outside, and motives from within. That is not to say that emotions are activated from without, but that emotions are usually aroused by external events and then are directed back toward those events. Motives, conversely, are often aroused by internal events, then directed toward objects in the environment. Another distinction between the two is that emotions invariably activate the autonomic nervous system, whereas motives typically do not. These distinctions, however, are not absolute. The sight of food, for instance, can trigger the motive of hunger, whereas severe hunger can arouse emotions. Nonetheless, for the reasons that they are so different and so similar, to discuss either intelligently, emotions and motives must be separated as issues.
Traditional arguments surrounding emotions should be irrelevant to any analysis of emotions; an emotion is neither a sensation nor a physiological occurrence. Nor is it an occurrence of any other kind; it does not simply “happen.” Emotions are rational and purposive. Emotions are actions. The individual chooses to emote, whether on a conscious or subconscious level, much as the individual chooses a course of action. It always makes sense to praise or blame a person for either contributing to a situation that incites an emotion or for having the emotion itself. A person can be blamed for unjustified anger, for instance, or praised for courage.
Human beings share a strong emotional commitment to the feeling of free will, and to feeling that they are free to act any way they choose. Choice or control, illusory or not, is crucial to human motivational systems and feelings of well-being.
(Taken from "Emotions by Choice" (2001) by Lora Morrow)
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
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Similar as they are, they need to be distinguished. The most common basis for distinguishng between them assumes that emotions are triggered from the outside, and motives from within. That is not to say that emotions are activated from without, but that emotions are usually aroused by external events and then are directed back toward those events. Motives, conversely, are often aroused by internal events, then directed toward objects in the environment. Another distinction between the two is that emotions invariably activate the autonomic nervous system, whereas motives typically do not. These distinctions, however, are not absolute. The sight of food, for instance, can trigger the motive of hunger, whereas severe hunger can arouse emotions. Nonetheless, for the reasons that they are so different and so similar, to discuss either intelligently, emotions and motives must be separated as issues.
Traditional arguments surrounding emotions should be irrelevant to any analysis of emotions; an emotion is neither a sensation nor a physiological occurrence. Nor is it an occurrence of any other kind; it does not simply “happen.” Emotions are rational and purposive. Emotions are actions. The individual chooses to emote, whether on a conscious or subconscious level, much as the individual chooses a course of action. It always makes sense to praise or blame a person for either contributing to a situation that incites an emotion or for having the emotion itself. A person can be blamed for unjustified anger, for instance, or praised for courage.
Human beings share a strong emotional commitment to the feeling of free will, and to feeling that they are free to act any way they choose. Choice or control, illusory or not, is crucial to human motivational systems and feelings of well-being.
(Taken from "Emotions by Choice" (2001) by Lora Morrow)
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
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Monday, November 22, 2010
Take Care of Yourself . . .
If you make a difference in one individuals life, you've accomplished a lot. Why not make that one individual yourself? I use this saying with many of my clients. Most don't understand the meaning at first. I explain that it's not about being selfish, it is about sharing. How one thinks and believes about oneself is a reflection one how one treats others.
Sayings such as "To thy self be true" and "Do unto others as you have them do unto you" are just a couple examples that indicate that our lives begin and end from what we become and who we are from within.
First, we must accept the wonderful gifts that God has given us. Once we do that, we can honestly begin to be thankful. By being thankful we can put what we have been given toward good works.
Make a list of how blessed you really are, then each day after make it a point to add to the list. Soon you will experience growth, just like the list that is in front of you. Graditude will change attitude. So today and everyday, give thanks for what God has given to you, and go out and use it. Beware, if you don't use it, you will lose it.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
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Free Video Reveals #1 Secret On Absolutely Conquering Stress Today! Click Here Now!
Sayings such as "To thy self be true" and "Do unto others as you have them do unto you" are just a couple examples that indicate that our lives begin and end from what we become and who we are from within.
First, we must accept the wonderful gifts that God has given us. Once we do that, we can honestly begin to be thankful. By being thankful we can put what we have been given toward good works.
Make a list of how blessed you really are, then each day after make it a point to add to the list. Soon you will experience growth, just like the list that is in front of you. Graditude will change attitude. So today and everyday, give thanks for what God has given to you, and go out and use it. Beware, if you don't use it, you will lose it.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
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Free Video Reveals #1 Secret On Absolutely Conquering Stress Today! Click Here Now!
Tuesday, November 9, 2010
Tips On Dealing Effectively With Stress
Sometimes it seems as if life is a series of losses--the loss of a spouse, the loss of a job, the loss of a brother. You may realize you need to take time to grieve all of these losses. But what you may not realize is that such losses can also lead to chronic stress--a great deal of it. To remain emotionally healthy, you must learn to deal effectively with stress induced by traumatic life events.
For instance, you might decide to delay a major decision such as the purchase of a new home until you've successfully battled the stress from your divorce. Or you may decide to wait before taking a new job until you've dealt with the stress from your wedding. This self awareness can enable you to reduce your stress level and to maintain your equilibrium as you go through life’s struggles.
One of the healthiest things you can do is to draw up a list of stress causing life events and post it in a place where your entire family can see it. That way, you'll have a constant reminder of just what you're up against. This can also serve to encourage your family at a time of great heartache. Family members will be able to see that the event is a normal part of life–one that many other families face. As a result, they'll be able to put the event in perspective.
Another important thing to do is to verbalize your feelings about a stressful event. Talk to your mate, your parents, a friend, or your pastor. If you feel as if there's simply no one to confide in, you might consider therapy.
Talking about your feelings is an important part of the healing process, and will enable you to deal with the stress much more efficiently. Another good option is to commit your feelings to writing. Keep a journal and use it to express your innermost thoughts. You might be surprised by how therapeutic this can be.
Another important strategy is simply to "take it slow." Don't hurry when making major life decisions, particularly when you are faced with a crisis. Recognize that most things in life do not require instantaneous decisions. You have the luxury of time, so use it to your full advantage. In the end, you'll be happy you've taken the time to think things through, rather than making rash decisions. If you're in a "calm mode," you'll also be better able to handle the stress of difficult situations.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
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Free Video Reveals #1 Secret On Absolutely Conquering Stress Today! Click Here Now!
For instance, you might decide to delay a major decision such as the purchase of a new home until you've successfully battled the stress from your divorce. Or you may decide to wait before taking a new job until you've dealt with the stress from your wedding. This self awareness can enable you to reduce your stress level and to maintain your equilibrium as you go through life’s struggles.
One of the healthiest things you can do is to draw up a list of stress causing life events and post it in a place where your entire family can see it. That way, you'll have a constant reminder of just what you're up against. This can also serve to encourage your family at a time of great heartache. Family members will be able to see that the event is a normal part of life–one that many other families face. As a result, they'll be able to put the event in perspective.
Another important thing to do is to verbalize your feelings about a stressful event. Talk to your mate, your parents, a friend, or your pastor. If you feel as if there's simply no one to confide in, you might consider therapy.
Talking about your feelings is an important part of the healing process, and will enable you to deal with the stress much more efficiently. Another good option is to commit your feelings to writing. Keep a journal and use it to express your innermost thoughts. You might be surprised by how therapeutic this can be.
Another important strategy is simply to "take it slow." Don't hurry when making major life decisions, particularly when you are faced with a crisis. Recognize that most things in life do not require instantaneous decisions. You have the luxury of time, so use it to your full advantage. In the end, you'll be happy you've taken the time to think things through, rather than making rash decisions. If you're in a "calm mode," you'll also be better able to handle the stress of difficult situations.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
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Free Video Reveals #1 Secret On Absolutely Conquering Stress Today! Click Here Now!
Friday, November 5, 2010
What's the Big Deal With Stress?
Numerous medical and psychological studies have shown that a large percentage of visits to doctor's offices are because of acute or chronic stress.
Stress is a normal process we use to appraise and attempt to cope with emotional threats and challenges. Stressors--events and situations--may be blamed for the uncomfortable effects of stress. But the way we perceive stressors determines whether stress is experienced as a panic or a challenge. While normal stress protects the body in times of threat, prolonged stress may potentially damage the body, including the brain.
When a stressful situation occurs, the body reacts with an outpouring of hormones, such as adrenaline, cortisol, and others. These hormones increase heart rate and respiration, send more blood to skeletal muscles, dull pain, stimulate the immune system, and turn sugar and fat into energy.
The stress response is the normal mechanism for addressing stressors in the body and the mind. In most cases, this response occurs for a limited time to aid the individual in dealing with a specific situation, then the body returns to its normal, relatively non-stressed state.
Sometimes, however, the presence of sustained stressors--abuse, combat, perceived unrealistic pressures, illness, anger-producing situations--can have markedly damaging effects on the body and the brain. Studies have showen that a prolonged flood of stress hormones can actually cause shrinking in certain areas of the brain, particularly in the hippocampus.
A major role of the hippocampus is in memory. It is not unusual for persons with prolonged stress to report forgetfulness and difficulty learning. A hopeful discovery is that certain portions of the hippocampus can recover once the stress response is reversed.
Since catastrophes, life changes, conflicts, and the myriad things that produce a stress reaction are a part of most people's lives, it is how we learn to interpret and control stressors that is crucial.
Coping with Stress
Exercise strengthens the body. It can reduce the experience of stress, depression, and anxiety. Dozens of scientific studies have demonstrated the relationship between exercise and mood. Exercise promotes arousal and relaxation, and improves quality of sleep. These conditions help the body recover from the stress response.
Relaxation through meditation, biofeedback, and a variety of other activities and techniques promotes lower blood pressure, slower respiration, reduced metabolism and muscle tension. These counteract the effects of stress.
Social contacts, friends, and family relationships can help in creating emotional trust, support, and relaxation. Even caring for a pet can provide significant emotional comfort that helps reduce stress.
Attitudes of confidence, positive ability to solve problems, and balance allow the cycle of stress response to resolve now and then instead of being sustained.
Healthy lifestyle–for example, abstinence from smoking, moderate use of alcohol, balanced nutrition and weight control, and slowing down and taking time to smell the roses–can promote a sense of peace and control over one's life. Stress is often related to the anxiety caused by a feeling of being out of control.
If one finds oneself in an ongoing state of stress, it may take qualified, outside help to put these measures into effective action. In this case, I heartily recommend it. It would surely beat the dangerous alternative.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
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Free Video Reveals #1 Secret On Absolutely Conquering Stress Today! http://www.ConquerStressToday.info
Stress is a normal process we use to appraise and attempt to cope with emotional threats and challenges. Stressors--events and situations--may be blamed for the uncomfortable effects of stress. But the way we perceive stressors determines whether stress is experienced as a panic or a challenge. While normal stress protects the body in times of threat, prolonged stress may potentially damage the body, including the brain.
When a stressful situation occurs, the body reacts with an outpouring of hormones, such as adrenaline, cortisol, and others. These hormones increase heart rate and respiration, send more blood to skeletal muscles, dull pain, stimulate the immune system, and turn sugar and fat into energy.
The stress response is the normal mechanism for addressing stressors in the body and the mind. In most cases, this response occurs for a limited time to aid the individual in dealing with a specific situation, then the body returns to its normal, relatively non-stressed state.
Sometimes, however, the presence of sustained stressors--abuse, combat, perceived unrealistic pressures, illness, anger-producing situations--can have markedly damaging effects on the body and the brain. Studies have showen that a prolonged flood of stress hormones can actually cause shrinking in certain areas of the brain, particularly in the hippocampus.
A major role of the hippocampus is in memory. It is not unusual for persons with prolonged stress to report forgetfulness and difficulty learning. A hopeful discovery is that certain portions of the hippocampus can recover once the stress response is reversed.
Since catastrophes, life changes, conflicts, and the myriad things that produce a stress reaction are a part of most people's lives, it is how we learn to interpret and control stressors that is crucial.
Coping with Stress
Exercise strengthens the body. It can reduce the experience of stress, depression, and anxiety. Dozens of scientific studies have demonstrated the relationship between exercise and mood. Exercise promotes arousal and relaxation, and improves quality of sleep. These conditions help the body recover from the stress response.
Relaxation through meditation, biofeedback, and a variety of other activities and techniques promotes lower blood pressure, slower respiration, reduced metabolism and muscle tension. These counteract the effects of stress.
Social contacts, friends, and family relationships can help in creating emotional trust, support, and relaxation. Even caring for a pet can provide significant emotional comfort that helps reduce stress.
Attitudes of confidence, positive ability to solve problems, and balance allow the cycle of stress response to resolve now and then instead of being sustained.
Healthy lifestyle–for example, abstinence from smoking, moderate use of alcohol, balanced nutrition and weight control, and slowing down and taking time to smell the roses–can promote a sense of peace and control over one's life. Stress is often related to the anxiety caused by a feeling of being out of control.
If one finds oneself in an ongoing state of stress, it may take qualified, outside help to put these measures into effective action. In this case, I heartily recommend it. It would surely beat the dangerous alternative.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Hey, don't leave me in the dark! Leave a little comment here for me. Did you like it? Hate it? Do you have anything else in mind? Let me know, right here. It's very easy: just click on the "comments" link immediately below. I would love to hear from you. :)
Free Video Reveals #1 Secret On Absolutely Conquering Stress Today! http://www.ConquerStressToday.info
Monday, November 1, 2010
Shadows on the Wall . . .
There once was a little girl named Sissy. She was like any other little girl her age. Sissy was a pretty girl with long, curly hair. But one thing stood out and ruined everything: Sissy had epilepsy. This caused her to have seizures. She would fall down and shake, then wet her pants. The other little children always made fun of her. They did not understand why she did those things.
Sissy could never remember what had happened. So she could not understand why they treated her so badly. All she knew is that she wanted other little girls and boys to like her. Yet nobody wanted to give Sissy a chance. This was worse than any thing else.
No matter how she tried, Sissy could not find a friend at school. She was always the last one chosen to a team in her P.E. class. Lunch period was even worse. Sissy would sit at a table, only to watch the others move to another one. Sissy was left to eat alone. During recess, Sissy sat off to the side as others laughed and played games. Many laughs were directed at her. Yet the smiles from the other faces put a smile on her own. This made her content as she witnessed their fun. But she often asked herself, "Why doesn't anyone like me?"
Sissy tried to get answers from her classmates. But the answer would not come. Nobody would tell her why. Sissy took the last resort. She went home and asked her mother the same question: "Why doesn't anyone like me?" Her mother replied, "You are just hard to get along with." Her mother's answer left Sissy even more confused. This led Sissy into her bedroom with tears in her eyes. No matter how sad she felt Sissy would not give up. She needed to find out why. Besides, Sissy knew that someday the answer would come.
Suddenly, Sissy looked up from her pillow. A shadow was dancing on the bedroom's wall. She felt comforted, no longer all alone. The shadows became her friends. Sissy came up with an idea. By using her hand the shadows could be any shape or form. They patted her on the shoulder. They rubbed her head when it hurt.
Sissy could share anything with her shadowy friends because they listened to her. Her seizures did not cause them to stop liking her. They were always there for her when she needed them. The warmth, filling her room, dried her tears and made her feel better.
Sissy no longer had to ask, "Why doesn't anyone like me?" Now, Sissy had friends to laugh and play with. The shadows turned the sadness into happiness. Her new friends gave her a chance. They gave her love. They made her feel special. Sissy's new friends would never turn away. They would be friends for life.
Sissy's friends showed her how to love others. When others treated Sissy badly she would love them anyway. The feeling of love was all around. Sissy got to where she could handle her seizures.
The answer to her question helped her to understand more about herself. Sissy realized that she was different. She also learned that everyone was different. Sissy no longer had to rely on others. She could rely on her heart. Her love made her heart grow. It kept growing. Sissy learned to be there for others. Her smile put smiles on other's faces.
As she kept growing Sissy's illness did not matter. Sissy even came across others where the seizures did not matter. More people began to not turn away, but instead wanted to stay. Many became her friends also.
All this started with the shadows on the wall. They became her friends and they were willing to give her a chance. Sissy learned what friendship was all about. She learned that just because someone is different does not mean they cannot be a friend. And Sissy's shadowy friends taught her that everyone deserves a chance.
Before jumping to conclusions, take a moment and find out more about one another. The best gift we can give each other is a friendship that lasts, and understanding will help make this happen. Love is no good unless it is shared. And when it is shared it keeps growing from that time on. Remember I need you; you need me; we need each other to share with.
(Retrieved from "Shadows on the Wall" by Lora Morrow, 2001.)
Sissy could never remember what had happened. So she could not understand why they treated her so badly. All she knew is that she wanted other little girls and boys to like her. Yet nobody wanted to give Sissy a chance. This was worse than any thing else.
No matter how she tried, Sissy could not find a friend at school. She was always the last one chosen to a team in her P.E. class. Lunch period was even worse. Sissy would sit at a table, only to watch the others move to another one. Sissy was left to eat alone. During recess, Sissy sat off to the side as others laughed and played games. Many laughs were directed at her. Yet the smiles from the other faces put a smile on her own. This made her content as she witnessed their fun. But she often asked herself, "Why doesn't anyone like me?"
Sissy tried to get answers from her classmates. But the answer would not come. Nobody would tell her why. Sissy took the last resort. She went home and asked her mother the same question: "Why doesn't anyone like me?" Her mother replied, "You are just hard to get along with." Her mother's answer left Sissy even more confused. This led Sissy into her bedroom with tears in her eyes. No matter how sad she felt Sissy would not give up. She needed to find out why. Besides, Sissy knew that someday the answer would come.
Suddenly, Sissy looked up from her pillow. A shadow was dancing on the bedroom's wall. She felt comforted, no longer all alone. The shadows became her friends. Sissy came up with an idea. By using her hand the shadows could be any shape or form. They patted her on the shoulder. They rubbed her head when it hurt.
Sissy could share anything with her shadowy friends because they listened to her. Her seizures did not cause them to stop liking her. They were always there for her when she needed them. The warmth, filling her room, dried her tears and made her feel better.
Sissy no longer had to ask, "Why doesn't anyone like me?" Now, Sissy had friends to laugh and play with. The shadows turned the sadness into happiness. Her new friends gave her a chance. They gave her love. They made her feel special. Sissy's new friends would never turn away. They would be friends for life.
Sissy's friends showed her how to love others. When others treated Sissy badly she would love them anyway. The feeling of love was all around. Sissy got to where she could handle her seizures.
The answer to her question helped her to understand more about herself. Sissy realized that she was different. She also learned that everyone was different. Sissy no longer had to rely on others. She could rely on her heart. Her love made her heart grow. It kept growing. Sissy learned to be there for others. Her smile put smiles on other's faces.
As she kept growing Sissy's illness did not matter. Sissy even came across others where the seizures did not matter. More people began to not turn away, but instead wanted to stay. Many became her friends also.
All this started with the shadows on the wall. They became her friends and they were willing to give her a chance. Sissy learned what friendship was all about. She learned that just because someone is different does not mean they cannot be a friend. And Sissy's shadowy friends taught her that everyone deserves a chance.
Before jumping to conclusions, take a moment and find out more about one another. The best gift we can give each other is a friendship that lasts, and understanding will help make this happen. Love is no good unless it is shared. And when it is shared it keeps growing from that time on. Remember I need you; you need me; we need each other to share with.
(Retrieved from "Shadows on the Wall" by Lora Morrow, 2001.)
Wednesday, October 27, 2010
Most touching thing I've seen since "Born Free"
READ THIS BEFORE WATCHING THE VIDEO:
THIS WOMAN IN THE VIDEO FOUND THIS LION INJURED IN THE FOREST READY TO DIE.
SHE TOOK THE LION WITH HER AND NURSED THE LION BACK TO HEALTH. WHEN THE LION WAS BETTER SHE MADE ARRANGEMENTS WITH A ZOO TO TAKE THE LION AND GIVE IT A NEW AND HAPPY HOME.
THIS VIDEO WAS TAKEN WHEN THE WOMAN AFTER SOME TIME WENT TO GO VISIT THE LION TO SEE HOW HE WAS DOING.
WATCH THE LION'S REACTION WHEN HE SEES HER. AMAZING!!!!!
(Video and description retrieved from YouTube at: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OFMzzlU3Tts).
THIS WOMAN IN THE VIDEO FOUND THIS LION INJURED IN THE FOREST READY TO DIE.
SHE TOOK THE LION WITH HER AND NURSED THE LION BACK TO HEALTH. WHEN THE LION WAS BETTER SHE MADE ARRANGEMENTS WITH A ZOO TO TAKE THE LION AND GIVE IT A NEW AND HAPPY HOME.
THIS VIDEO WAS TAKEN WHEN THE WOMAN AFTER SOME TIME WENT TO GO VISIT THE LION TO SEE HOW HE WAS DOING.
WATCH THE LION'S REACTION WHEN HE SEES HER. AMAZING!!!!!
(Video and description retrieved from YouTube at: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OFMzzlU3Tts).
"The wolf also shall dwell with the lamb, and the leopard shall lie down with the kid; and the calf and the young lion and the fatling together; and a little child shall lead them" - Isaiah 11:6.
Monday, October 25, 2010
Know Thyself . . .
Behavior is influenced generally by three facets of the self: (1) the actual self (the person’s self-concept); (2) the ideal self (what the person would like to be); and (3) the ought self (the mental representation of what that person should be).
We must be careful, however, with the term "actual." While there is, of course, an actual self, a person seldom arrives at an entirely accurate conclusion to that effect. Self-evaluation is subjective, obscuring the actual self from the person’s awareness.
This difference can delude the individual even in what the individual views as behavior. A particularly quick-tempered individual, for instance, although having the awareness of possessing that form of behavior, may be consciously unaware to what degree it exists. This is an explanation as to why we sometimes don’t really know why we hold an opinion or behaved in a particular way.
This form of self-delusion can also carry over how one views oneself, that is, one’s self-concept.
The late Earl Nightingale once asked a very wealthy friend when it was that he considered himself wealthy. The friend replied, "I was rich when I was dirt poor. My present possessions are only symptoms of the reality." A great deal of research has shown that self-concept may be the basis for all motivated behavior.
Although the terms "self-concept" and "self-esteem" have often been used interchangeably, the two have specific differences. Generally, self-concept composes the learned beliefs, attitudes and opinions that one holds to be true about oneself.
Self-esteem concerns the value the individual places on the self, or how one feels about the self, which is fed by the self-concept. It is, then, in effect, the system of measurement of the components of self-concept.
Self-esteem reflects a desire for strength, achievement, adequacy, mastery, and competence. They get to know themselves. When people know themselves, they can maximize outcomes because they know what they can and cannot do.
As one should be able to see, the path from true self-actualization to a healthy self-esteem can be difficult–almost impossible to achieve by oneself. This is one good reason for psychologists, trained ministers, and other competent counselors. It often can make a dramatic difference in one’s life-–and those lives of one’s loved ones-–to seek such assistance. It has been known to save marriages, careers, and, yes, very lives.
Free Video Reveals #1 Secret On Absolutely Conquering Stress Today! http://www.ConquerStressToday.info
We must be careful, however, with the term "actual." While there is, of course, an actual self, a person seldom arrives at an entirely accurate conclusion to that effect. Self-evaluation is subjective, obscuring the actual self from the person’s awareness.
This difference can delude the individual even in what the individual views as behavior. A particularly quick-tempered individual, for instance, although having the awareness of possessing that form of behavior, may be consciously unaware to what degree it exists. This is an explanation as to why we sometimes don’t really know why we hold an opinion or behaved in a particular way.
This form of self-delusion can also carry over how one views oneself, that is, one’s self-concept.
The late Earl Nightingale once asked a very wealthy friend when it was that he considered himself wealthy. The friend replied, "I was rich when I was dirt poor. My present possessions are only symptoms of the reality." A great deal of research has shown that self-concept may be the basis for all motivated behavior.
Although the terms "self-concept" and "self-esteem" have often been used interchangeably, the two have specific differences. Generally, self-concept composes the learned beliefs, attitudes and opinions that one holds to be true about oneself.
Self-esteem concerns the value the individual places on the self, or how one feels about the self, which is fed by the self-concept. It is, then, in effect, the system of measurement of the components of self-concept.
Self-esteem reflects a desire for strength, achievement, adequacy, mastery, and competence. They get to know themselves. When people know themselves, they can maximize outcomes because they know what they can and cannot do.
As one should be able to see, the path from true self-actualization to a healthy self-esteem can be difficult–almost impossible to achieve by oneself. This is one good reason for psychologists, trained ministers, and other competent counselors. It often can make a dramatic difference in one’s life-–and those lives of one’s loved ones-–to seek such assistance. It has been known to save marriages, careers, and, yes, very lives.
Free Video Reveals #1 Secret On Absolutely Conquering Stress Today! http://www.ConquerStressToday.info
Friday, October 22, 2010
Zig Ziglar - Attitude Makes All The Difference . . .
I recommend this highly. It is one of the best 10 minutes I've ever spent.
Free Video Reveals #1 Secret On Absolutely Conquering Stress Today! http://www.ConquerStressToday.info
Free Video Reveals #1 Secret On Absolutely Conquering Stress Today! http://www.ConquerStressToday.info
Thursday, October 21, 2010
Water and Health . . .
The first thing one must realize when considering water pollution is that, in its natural state, water is not pure. Water in its natural state contains minerals, gases, salts, trace metals, bacteria, and organic and inorganic particles. At naturally low concentrations these items are harmless, and some of the minerals and bacteria are even beneficial. It is when their concentrations become higher that the water becomes contaminated
Humankind’s track record is not good. History shows that, once water comes into contact with humans, it will almost certainly become polluted. Industrial waste dumps, landfills, and other effluents, radioactive wastes, artificial fertilizers, pesticides, sewage effluents, and household toxic wastes all leach into rivers and groundwater supplies and degrade them. Even air pollution, created mostly by humans, of course, contributes to water pollution: Atmospheric pollution mixes with water vapor, forming smog and acid rain.
Of all the different pollutants, one of the most dangerous is lead. Twenty percent of American households still have dangerous levels of lead in their tap water. It is, by far the biggest threat because of the level of impending danger. Children who drink lead-tainted water can incur irreversible brain damage, resulting in diminished I.Q. scores, short attention spans, and other mental problems. Infants born to women who have drunk lead-tainted water have also shown to sustain many of these problems.
Adults can suffer kidney damage, high blood pressure, and brittle bones due to lead poisoning. While an adult’s neurological tissue is less sensitive to lead than that of a child’s, the adult can still sustain brain damage because of the deleterious nature of lead.
Though most people have been exposed to "scare tactics" from persons trying to sell something such as safety equipment, it seems all a person selling water filters or treatment units would have to do is to convey the facts! As part of preventing pollution we must strive to become more familiar with what causes water pollution as well as start to learn about and to use safer alternatives.
Free Video Reveals #1 Secret On Absolutely Conquering Stress Today! http://www.ConquerStressToday.info
Humankind’s track record is not good. History shows that, once water comes into contact with humans, it will almost certainly become polluted. Industrial waste dumps, landfills, and other effluents, radioactive wastes, artificial fertilizers, pesticides, sewage effluents, and household toxic wastes all leach into rivers and groundwater supplies and degrade them. Even air pollution, created mostly by humans, of course, contributes to water pollution: Atmospheric pollution mixes with water vapor, forming smog and acid rain.
Of all the different pollutants, one of the most dangerous is lead. Twenty percent of American households still have dangerous levels of lead in their tap water. It is, by far the biggest threat because of the level of impending danger. Children who drink lead-tainted water can incur irreversible brain damage, resulting in diminished I.Q. scores, short attention spans, and other mental problems. Infants born to women who have drunk lead-tainted water have also shown to sustain many of these problems.
Adults can suffer kidney damage, high blood pressure, and brittle bones due to lead poisoning. While an adult’s neurological tissue is less sensitive to lead than that of a child’s, the adult can still sustain brain damage because of the deleterious nature of lead.
Though most people have been exposed to "scare tactics" from persons trying to sell something such as safety equipment, it seems all a person selling water filters or treatment units would have to do is to convey the facts! As part of preventing pollution we must strive to become more familiar with what causes water pollution as well as start to learn about and to use safer alternatives.
Free Video Reveals #1 Secret On Absolutely Conquering Stress Today! http://www.ConquerStressToday.info
Monday, October 18, 2010
There's a Killer in Your Home . . .
The media has stormed the public with information regarding texting and using cell phones while driving. Thousands have been either killed or injured in such practices. Talk show hosts, such as Opra, can't express the dangers enough. Once one decreases one’s focus while driving, the outcome can become devastating.
There is something else, something very common, that can be just as deadly while driving, and it can be found right in the medicine cabinet.
Now that we're in the cold and flu season, it is best to be up to date on what could happen when treating such conditions, and others. Any medication, over the counter or prescribed, can put you and others at risk. Several thousands of people suffer from pain, depression, and or allergies, and most are taking some form of medication for relief.
The shocking news it that any medication that has effect on making one drowsy, or causing a lack of coherence, can be used against a driver as a DUI. Even if one isn't involved in an accident and is just pulled over, an officer can suspect you are impaired, and the costly battle begins.
It can cost up to $10,000 and more to get an attorney to represent you in such cases. Depending on the situation, it has often taken more than a year to get them resolved. Before the court finds one guilty of the DUI charge, one’s license can be taken away, the vehicle impounded, time served in jail. If it is a felony, one is left with a permanent record. If you are involved in an accident, it doesn't matter what little bit of levels are in your system. YOU ARE GUILTY!
This is not to be taken lightly. It can be an expense of one's job, or even losing needed government benefits. In the professional perspective, it can make it impossible for one to obtain a license in one's field. In other words, it can destroy a career.
Use precautions while taking any medication, either over the counter, or prescribed. Research the side effects, and listen to your body as to how you are reacting to such medication.
Be aware that the law does not treat this lightly. They will prosecute you for a DUI. Better safe than sorry.
Free Video Reveals #1 Secret On Absolutely Conquering Stress Today! http://www.ConquerStressToday.info
There is something else, something very common, that can be just as deadly while driving, and it can be found right in the medicine cabinet.
Now that we're in the cold and flu season, it is best to be up to date on what could happen when treating such conditions, and others. Any medication, over the counter or prescribed, can put you and others at risk. Several thousands of people suffer from pain, depression, and or allergies, and most are taking some form of medication for relief.
The shocking news it that any medication that has effect on making one drowsy, or causing a lack of coherence, can be used against a driver as a DUI. Even if one isn't involved in an accident and is just pulled over, an officer can suspect you are impaired, and the costly battle begins.
It can cost up to $10,000 and more to get an attorney to represent you in such cases. Depending on the situation, it has often taken more than a year to get them resolved. Before the court finds one guilty of the DUI charge, one’s license can be taken away, the vehicle impounded, time served in jail. If it is a felony, one is left with a permanent record. If you are involved in an accident, it doesn't matter what little bit of levels are in your system. YOU ARE GUILTY!
This is not to be taken lightly. It can be an expense of one's job, or even losing needed government benefits. In the professional perspective, it can make it impossible for one to obtain a license in one's field. In other words, it can destroy a career.
Use precautions while taking any medication, either over the counter, or prescribed. Research the side effects, and listen to your body as to how you are reacting to such medication.
Be aware that the law does not treat this lightly. They will prosecute you for a DUI. Better safe than sorry.
Free Video Reveals #1 Secret On Absolutely Conquering Stress Today! http://www.ConquerStressToday.info
Thursday, October 14, 2010
Medical Treatment Depends on Attitude
A patient’s attitude is so important to surgeons that many of them will delay a major operation until they become convinced that the patient is reasonably optimistic about the outcome. At the same time, it is important to note that the patients can jeopardize their own health care by becoming too optimistic about their health status, which can lead to neglecting that care.
It seems that perhaps the trait of optimism, regarding health issues, should be divided into two types, each having differing health implications. The more positive type relates to an individual’s sense of efficacy, of the ability to overcome any obstacle, any challenge that may arise. While this may seem a good start, the more extreme variety may lead to a form of denial, the inability to acknowledge symptoms or threats to well-being.
The defensive type not only lacks benefit, but can actually enhance a health risk. This type would include optimistic bias, or the inability to apply a health risk to one’s self.
A deficit in optimism (the positive type), coming from the sense of helplessness in its most severe forms, can lead to tragic consequences, such as the phenomena of "unexplained" deaths of people who believed themselves in hopeless circumstances.
In some cases, for example, persons died after ingesting toxic substances, of which the amounts were often too small even to make them sick. In addition, numerous studies have shown a marked correspondence between increased health problems and the amount of stress from multiple life changes (for example, unemployment, relocation, bereavement, divorce, death in the family) in a recently preceding period.
Such health effects, however, are much more prominent among persons already having low self-esteem. A surprising revelation was that even dramatic events on the good side can have undesirable effects on people who did not expect them. This tends to lead one to the belief that it is the amount of adjustment following change, or the interpretation of a stressor, that can overtax an individual’s defensive resources.
The point is that the individual does not always have a realistic grasp on the actual physical condition. Therefore, although people generally consider four components in deciding whether to seek medical help and follow advice (identity, time line, consequences, and cause of the disease), their perceptions can actually be skewed by existing psychological factors and, principally, their belief systems.
Because I believe that the interpretation of stressors–those factors causing stress–is the most influential factor on health, the patient must master these techniques before going on to others. The others, then will be addressed accordingly, such as deciding on a purpose in life, educating oneself in the disease that afflicts, diet, etc.
(Notes taken from “Belief and Reality: The Major Lifestyle Issues” (2002) by Lora Morrow)
Free Video Reveals #1 Secret On Absolutely Conquering Stress Today! http://www.ConquerStressToday.info
It seems that perhaps the trait of optimism, regarding health issues, should be divided into two types, each having differing health implications. The more positive type relates to an individual’s sense of efficacy, of the ability to overcome any obstacle, any challenge that may arise. While this may seem a good start, the more extreme variety may lead to a form of denial, the inability to acknowledge symptoms or threats to well-being.
The defensive type not only lacks benefit, but can actually enhance a health risk. This type would include optimistic bias, or the inability to apply a health risk to one’s self.
A deficit in optimism (the positive type), coming from the sense of helplessness in its most severe forms, can lead to tragic consequences, such as the phenomena of "unexplained" deaths of people who believed themselves in hopeless circumstances.
In some cases, for example, persons died after ingesting toxic substances, of which the amounts were often too small even to make them sick. In addition, numerous studies have shown a marked correspondence between increased health problems and the amount of stress from multiple life changes (for example, unemployment, relocation, bereavement, divorce, death in the family) in a recently preceding period.
Such health effects, however, are much more prominent among persons already having low self-esteem. A surprising revelation was that even dramatic events on the good side can have undesirable effects on people who did not expect them. This tends to lead one to the belief that it is the amount of adjustment following change, or the interpretation of a stressor, that can overtax an individual’s defensive resources.
The point is that the individual does not always have a realistic grasp on the actual physical condition. Therefore, although people generally consider four components in deciding whether to seek medical help and follow advice (identity, time line, consequences, and cause of the disease), their perceptions can actually be skewed by existing psychological factors and, principally, their belief systems.
Because I believe that the interpretation of stressors–those factors causing stress–is the most influential factor on health, the patient must master these techniques before going on to others. The others, then will be addressed accordingly, such as deciding on a purpose in life, educating oneself in the disease that afflicts, diet, etc.
(Notes taken from “Belief and Reality: The Major Lifestyle Issues” (2002) by Lora Morrow)
Free Video Reveals #1 Secret On Absolutely Conquering Stress Today! http://www.ConquerStressToday.info
Monday, October 11, 2010
The Ravages of Shame
What provokes shame is the feeling of being seen as a person other than who we are, the feeling of being misunderstood. It is a sense of deficit in the self. Feelings of shame and humiliation are affective states that require considerable evaluative and self-evaluative components.
All these processes concern man’s social nature. We can distinguish between an “aggressive sociality,” in which an individual, in striving to achieve his aims, is not concerned about damaging other people; and an “adoptive sociality,” in which the individual may favor others or seek the approval and collaboration of others in achieving an objective.
Humans project various images of themselves, depending on the type of image that is sought, what is most useful in particular circumstances, and for whom the image is intended. An image of appeasement and nonaggression toward a possible partner in the act of courtship may be combined with an aggressive or combative image when in the face of a rival or when it is important to mark one’s territory.
Shame is about the self, which is the self only by virtue of confirmation, recognition, affirmation, and perhaps understanding from others. The self-conscious awareness that self image is dependant on other people’s opinions and the possibility of failure or rejection gives rise to shame.
Shame (and guilt, which may or may not be synonomous) is a state of anxiety. There is a fundamental difference between standard emotion and the state of anxiety. While emotions generically comprise a necessary part of our intellectual makeup, anxiety will invariably and inevitably sabotage the intellect. The intellectual structures we create for ourselves are never completely secure. Anxiety is one basic cause of its impending or actual collapse.
I realize this piece may be somewhat hard to follow, and for that I apologize. The bottom line is that shame, or any type of stress and anxiety, can damage or even destroy careers, families, and even lives, and, just as the above is rather complicated, so can be dealing with stress and anxiety. This is why trying to tackle it by oneself is not often successful.
Get your free CD on Conquering Stress Today! http://www.ConquerStressToday.info
All these processes concern man’s social nature. We can distinguish between an “aggressive sociality,” in which an individual, in striving to achieve his aims, is not concerned about damaging other people; and an “adoptive sociality,” in which the individual may favor others or seek the approval and collaboration of others in achieving an objective.
Humans project various images of themselves, depending on the type of image that is sought, what is most useful in particular circumstances, and for whom the image is intended. An image of appeasement and nonaggression toward a possible partner in the act of courtship may be combined with an aggressive or combative image when in the face of a rival or when it is important to mark one’s territory.
Shame is about the self, which is the self only by virtue of confirmation, recognition, affirmation, and perhaps understanding from others. The self-conscious awareness that self image is dependant on other people’s opinions and the possibility of failure or rejection gives rise to shame.
Shame (and guilt, which may or may not be synonomous) is a state of anxiety. There is a fundamental difference between standard emotion and the state of anxiety. While emotions generically comprise a necessary part of our intellectual makeup, anxiety will invariably and inevitably sabotage the intellect. The intellectual structures we create for ourselves are never completely secure. Anxiety is one basic cause of its impending or actual collapse.
I realize this piece may be somewhat hard to follow, and for that I apologize. The bottom line is that shame, or any type of stress and anxiety, can damage or even destroy careers, families, and even lives, and, just as the above is rather complicated, so can be dealing with stress and anxiety. This is why trying to tackle it by oneself is not often successful.
Get your free CD on Conquering Stress Today! http://www.ConquerStressToday.info
Monday, September 20, 2010
Taking On the Fruits of the Spirit
"The fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, long-suffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, meekness, temperance" (Galatians 5:22). These are the characteristics of a healthy personality.
If anyone knew how to itemize principles, it was Carl Rogers. An example of such is what Rogers referred to as "statements of significant learnings," and the following is just one example of those: "In my relationships with persons I have found that it does not help, in the long run, to act as though I were something I am not."1
Rogers went on to discuss the need to trust the self. This is important in interpreting an event presenting itself. The person, not the facts, holds the key to an individual’s future. Facts and events do not dictate conclusions. Rather, they carry meanings for people to discover.
Behaviors are conducted according to how a person anticipates events. Perhaps this is a basis to the many problems facing society today: It is simply a macrocosm, a sociological example, of the individual personality. The human is results-oriented: In other words, expediency rules the day. The human is anarchistic by nature and bent toward chaos.
Individual differences of interpretation is a major reason for this. A person’s beliefs, and assumptions have a major impact on the perception, recall, and interpretation of events.
The result, then, composes differences of interpretation. A number of individuals, for instance, may be observing a fact, or phenomenon, and the resulting number of interpretations of that phenomenon may well equal the number of observing individuals. With that as a launchpad, as it were, humans make decisions based on their own predictions, which are funneled through their own interpretations, which are based substantially on past experiences, both in education and conditioning.
A healthy personality is composed of many aspects and facets. The primary one may be the ability to conform its unique perspectives, borne of the realization that they are indeed unique. If we, then can come to the conclusion that we are as different to others as they are to us, then we will have a better chance of taking on the characteristics listed in the first sentence of this discussion.
Get your free CD on Conquering Stress Today!
http://www.ConquerStressToday.info
If anyone knew how to itemize principles, it was Carl Rogers. An example of such is what Rogers referred to as "statements of significant learnings," and the following is just one example of those: "In my relationships with persons I have found that it does not help, in the long run, to act as though I were something I am not."1
Rogers went on to discuss the need to trust the self. This is important in interpreting an event presenting itself. The person, not the facts, holds the key to an individual’s future. Facts and events do not dictate conclusions. Rather, they carry meanings for people to discover.
Behaviors are conducted according to how a person anticipates events. Perhaps this is a basis to the many problems facing society today: It is simply a macrocosm, a sociological example, of the individual personality. The human is results-oriented: In other words, expediency rules the day. The human is anarchistic by nature and bent toward chaos.
Individual differences of interpretation is a major reason for this. A person’s beliefs, and assumptions have a major impact on the perception, recall, and interpretation of events.
The result, then, composes differences of interpretation. A number of individuals, for instance, may be observing a fact, or phenomenon, and the resulting number of interpretations of that phenomenon may well equal the number of observing individuals. With that as a launchpad, as it were, humans make decisions based on their own predictions, which are funneled through their own interpretations, which are based substantially on past experiences, both in education and conditioning.
A healthy personality is composed of many aspects and facets. The primary one may be the ability to conform its unique perspectives, borne of the realization that they are indeed unique. If we, then can come to the conclusion that we are as different to others as they are to us, then we will have a better chance of taking on the characteristics listed in the first sentence of this discussion.
Get your free CD on Conquering Stress Today!
http://www.ConquerStressToday.info
Thursday, September 16, 2010
Conditioning Your Buying Habits
Many times, I have wondered what on earth the elements of a given commercial or advertisement has to do with the product itself. An example is that of the attractive, skimpily clad female singing star, whose performance over television had so raptly captured the attention of a male viewer that he didn’t notice that the restaurant in which he was working was on fire. What did this have to do with the taste or enjoyment of the product, in this case, a certain cola?
This,is an example of the effects of the association of even an unrelated pleasure to a product. The advertising agency was using the comedy form of entertainment in an effort to make the commercial entertaining as the program itself. The viewer, then, hopefully would automatically reach for that brand of cola during the next trip to the store.
Meanwhile, another brand probably sitting right beside it, plays upon natural human greed by advertising right on the container that the buyer may become a millionaire just by purchasing that can (and multiply those chances by buying a six or twelve pack).
Neither of these ploys, of course, has anything to do with the quality or quantity of the respective products themselves. But the technique of associating an otherwise unassociated pleasure with the satisfaction of the perceived need to fulfill that pleasure may in fact be more effective. In this case, the advertiser is exploiting the male’s (usually) innate attraction to females to create a humorous, therefore pleasurable, and memorable experience.
This effect is known in the world of psychology as “classical conditioning.” A very well simplified and clear explanation of classical conditioning is that it occurs when a stimulus designed to get a certain response is paired with another stimulus that, of itself, initially would not have such an effect. So over time, this second stimulus will cause a similar response because it is associated with the first one.
An example of this is an ad that ran some time ago promoting a laundry starch. The most prominent feature of the commercial was a waterfall. What did that have to do with starch? An explanation may be found a study where 79% of a group of students chose a pen of the same color of that to which they had been exposed while listening to music they enjoyed. Yet 70% of another group, who had listened to music strange to them, picked one of a different color. This is a classic example of associating a specific object with a pleasurable experience, which in turn creates a “false pleasure” to get a response, in this case buying their product.
So the next time you reach past one brand to buy the next, or ignore the generic version, which, deep down, you know may be just as good, this may help you understand just why you did that.
Get your free CD on Conquering Stress Today! http://www.ConquerStressToday.info
This,is an example of the effects of the association of even an unrelated pleasure to a product. The advertising agency was using the comedy form of entertainment in an effort to make the commercial entertaining as the program itself. The viewer, then, hopefully would automatically reach for that brand of cola during the next trip to the store.
Meanwhile, another brand probably sitting right beside it, plays upon natural human greed by advertising right on the container that the buyer may become a millionaire just by purchasing that can (and multiply those chances by buying a six or twelve pack).
Neither of these ploys, of course, has anything to do with the quality or quantity of the respective products themselves. But the technique of associating an otherwise unassociated pleasure with the satisfaction of the perceived need to fulfill that pleasure may in fact be more effective. In this case, the advertiser is exploiting the male’s (usually) innate attraction to females to create a humorous, therefore pleasurable, and memorable experience.
This effect is known in the world of psychology as “classical conditioning.” A very well simplified and clear explanation of classical conditioning is that it occurs when a stimulus designed to get a certain response is paired with another stimulus that, of itself, initially would not have such an effect. So over time, this second stimulus will cause a similar response because it is associated with the first one.
An example of this is an ad that ran some time ago promoting a laundry starch. The most prominent feature of the commercial was a waterfall. What did that have to do with starch? An explanation may be found a study where 79% of a group of students chose a pen of the same color of that to which they had been exposed while listening to music they enjoyed. Yet 70% of another group, who had listened to music strange to them, picked one of a different color. This is a classic example of associating a specific object with a pleasurable experience, which in turn creates a “false pleasure” to get a response, in this case buying their product.
So the next time you reach past one brand to buy the next, or ignore the generic version, which, deep down, you know may be just as good, this may help you understand just why you did that.
Get your free CD on Conquering Stress Today! http://www.ConquerStressToday.info
Thursday, September 9, 2010
The Mind and Chronic Pain
Pain comes in three stages: (1) acute, or adaptive and lasting less than six months; (2) chronic, enduring beyond the time of healing, constant and self-perpetuating, and often occurring in the absence of detectable tissue damage; and (3) prechronic, which essentially includes characteristics somewhere between the former two.
The most significant factor to chronic pain is its invisibility. That is, acute pain can usually be traced to an obvious injury--a cut, an infection. The removal of the cause will produce relief from that pain. Chronic pain is typically not so easily remedied, which is why it is so difficult to understand.
While explaining acute pain can be as simple as pointing to an underlying physical problem, chronic pain does not necessarily serve as such a useful warning of a physical problem. Rather, it often becomes a problem in itself. Indeed, chronic pain takes on many of the characteristics of its own root cause, leading to further problems, resulting in a vicious cycle. Psychological trauma and the actual physical processes--sometimes seemingly unrelated--seem to fuel each other.
Pain, for instance, can alter our moods and perceptions of stress, causing us, mostly unknowingly, to crave certain foods that naturally release serotonin, to elevate our moods, and endorphins, which are natural opiates that relieve pain. Candy and pastries fall into this category, for example, which can lead to obesity.
Psychologically, pain is generally described as a perceived response derived from our emotions and thoughts. The view in Eastern part of the world is generally more graphic. While Western science tends assume that the causes of pain exist on the physical level, Eastern thought regards that level as secondary.
Pain, from the general Eastern view, is an illusion, grounded in a conviction that we are helpless. Pain is simply viewed as information about what must be changed. This philosophy may be an explanation for the reputation of Eastern peoples for their often superior tolerance to pain. Tolerance to pain depends on memories, experiences, family history, personal biology, and culture.
From a my own perspective, chronic pain is a prolonged absence of well being. The most obvious, of course, is physical pain. Yet there is also emotional pain, which can be just as torturous, just as debilitating.
The typical Western method of treating either pain, of course, is through medication. While this has produced temporary relief, it by no means has approached a “cure,” either on a physical or emotional level.
Moreover, this form of treatment has had its own consequences: How many addicts, for instance, has it produced? And side effects can be serious–even fatal. This is what is so attractive about the Eastern philosophies: They imply that there are possibilities of procedures to help to eliminate chronic pain from the psychological side.
The power of the mind over pain can be absolutely astounding. This has already been demonstrated through my own counseling.
Get your free CD on Conquering Stress Today! http://www.ConquerStressToday.info
The most significant factor to chronic pain is its invisibility. That is, acute pain can usually be traced to an obvious injury--a cut, an infection. The removal of the cause will produce relief from that pain. Chronic pain is typically not so easily remedied, which is why it is so difficult to understand.
While explaining acute pain can be as simple as pointing to an underlying physical problem, chronic pain does not necessarily serve as such a useful warning of a physical problem. Rather, it often becomes a problem in itself. Indeed, chronic pain takes on many of the characteristics of its own root cause, leading to further problems, resulting in a vicious cycle. Psychological trauma and the actual physical processes--sometimes seemingly unrelated--seem to fuel each other.
Pain, for instance, can alter our moods and perceptions of stress, causing us, mostly unknowingly, to crave certain foods that naturally release serotonin, to elevate our moods, and endorphins, which are natural opiates that relieve pain. Candy and pastries fall into this category, for example, which can lead to obesity.
Psychologically, pain is generally described as a perceived response derived from our emotions and thoughts. The view in Eastern part of the world is generally more graphic. While Western science tends assume that the causes of pain exist on the physical level, Eastern thought regards that level as secondary.
Pain, from the general Eastern view, is an illusion, grounded in a conviction that we are helpless. Pain is simply viewed as information about what must be changed. This philosophy may be an explanation for the reputation of Eastern peoples for their often superior tolerance to pain. Tolerance to pain depends on memories, experiences, family history, personal biology, and culture.
From a my own perspective, chronic pain is a prolonged absence of well being. The most obvious, of course, is physical pain. Yet there is also emotional pain, which can be just as torturous, just as debilitating.
The typical Western method of treating either pain, of course, is through medication. While this has produced temporary relief, it by no means has approached a “cure,” either on a physical or emotional level.
Moreover, this form of treatment has had its own consequences: How many addicts, for instance, has it produced? And side effects can be serious–even fatal. This is what is so attractive about the Eastern philosophies: They imply that there are possibilities of procedures to help to eliminate chronic pain from the psychological side.
The power of the mind over pain can be absolutely astounding. This has already been demonstrated through my own counseling.
Get your free CD on Conquering Stress Today! http://www.ConquerStressToday.info
Monday, September 6, 2010
Working With Illness: Do You Mind?
Patients may not find adequate answers in the doctor’s office for their emotional reactions. Physicians are admittedly often largely unprepared to deal with them. It becomes obvious, then, that psychological services are needed to supplement traditional health care both to help patients to create more positive images of their situations and themselves and even to improve their adherence to their medical regimens.
As patients, it is necessary to become aware of our automatic thoughts. We need to learn to define what we have lost and to deal with emotional realities. This will help us to release our emotions and go forward with our lives
Beyond this “discovery” process, we must release the identity we have assumed that is associated with our illness. We must learn to overcome anxiety, both from the illness and life itself.
Emotional control and pain management are very effectively implemented through well-applied meditational techniques, such as breathing exercises. Goal setting and management are achieved through affirmations and visualization. We must learn also to monitor our thinking, eliminating negative and anxiety-producing thoughts and replacing them with positive ones. This will help us to dispense with our negative automatic thoughts and replace them with more rational, realistic thinking.
Loved ones must not be neglected; they must go through generally similar processes for the patient’s sake and their own. They must be taught that they cannot control nor bear responsibility for anyone’s behavior but their own. They must become educated as possible in the patient’s illness; the more they know, the more they can be of aid to the patient. They must support the patient’s endeavors toward independence, rather than to follow natural tendencies to maintain the patient’s dependence on them. They must be careful not to project emotions of guilt, grief, or frustration onto the patient. The patient has enough sense of loss to overcome without such negative involvement.
The conclusion is simple: The mind can hasten or inhibit the control over and recovery from virtually every disease and physical condition. Yet this may be the most neglected aspect of treatment and recovery. If we want the best results–or if we want them for a loved one–we must address the mind as diligently as we do the body.
Get your free CD on Conquering Stress Today! http://www.ConquerStressToday.info
As patients, it is necessary to become aware of our automatic thoughts. We need to learn to define what we have lost and to deal with emotional realities. This will help us to release our emotions and go forward with our lives
Beyond this “discovery” process, we must release the identity we have assumed that is associated with our illness. We must learn to overcome anxiety, both from the illness and life itself.
Emotional control and pain management are very effectively implemented through well-applied meditational techniques, such as breathing exercises. Goal setting and management are achieved through affirmations and visualization. We must learn also to monitor our thinking, eliminating negative and anxiety-producing thoughts and replacing them with positive ones. This will help us to dispense with our negative automatic thoughts and replace them with more rational, realistic thinking.
Loved ones must not be neglected; they must go through generally similar processes for the patient’s sake and their own. They must be taught that they cannot control nor bear responsibility for anyone’s behavior but their own. They must become educated as possible in the patient’s illness; the more they know, the more they can be of aid to the patient. They must support the patient’s endeavors toward independence, rather than to follow natural tendencies to maintain the patient’s dependence on them. They must be careful not to project emotions of guilt, grief, or frustration onto the patient. The patient has enough sense of loss to overcome without such negative involvement.
The conclusion is simple: The mind can hasten or inhibit the control over and recovery from virtually every disease and physical condition. Yet this may be the most neglected aspect of treatment and recovery. If we want the best results–or if we want them for a loved one–we must address the mind as diligently as we do the body.
Get your free CD on Conquering Stress Today! http://www.ConquerStressToday.info
Tuesday, August 31, 2010
Treating Stress: Random Notes
For the majority of my life I have been concerned for other people's happiness and welfare. One of the most powerful, most destructive enemies of these states of existence is chronic stress.
Stress afflicts virtually everyone in our society in one form or another and to various degrees. Almost everything that happens in life is a potential cause of or an aggravating factor to stress. This is what intrigues me the most: that the need for help in this area is so ubiquitous in our society. Left unattended, severe stress can lead to serious consequences, which creates a critical need in those individuals. I feel a compulsion to do my part in fulfilling that need.
Virtually everyone has received some sort of treatment, therapy or other remedy to remove a physical pain, only to expose another previously undetected yet existent pain. So it is with the psych: A mind with one problem usually has many others. It seems to me that the only effective way to conduct therapy for virtually any purely psychological problem is to replace, renew, rebuild, or redirect the thought processes. This will usually eventually require an eclectic approach to treatment rather than being content with the solution of an isolated problem.
This represents a challenge to me–often a very difficult challenge. It is this that I relish, especially when I think of the results when I can reach a successful conclusion in a "project." That will mean one more person will have come closer to a life of joy and peace of mind. Toward this cause I have dedicated my life.
(Notes taken from "Stress and Coping" (1995) by Lora Morrow)
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Stress afflicts virtually everyone in our society in one form or another and to various degrees. Almost everything that happens in life is a potential cause of or an aggravating factor to stress. This is what intrigues me the most: that the need for help in this area is so ubiquitous in our society. Left unattended, severe stress can lead to serious consequences, which creates a critical need in those individuals. I feel a compulsion to do my part in fulfilling that need.
Virtually everyone has received some sort of treatment, therapy or other remedy to remove a physical pain, only to expose another previously undetected yet existent pain. So it is with the psych: A mind with one problem usually has many others. It seems to me that the only effective way to conduct therapy for virtually any purely psychological problem is to replace, renew, rebuild, or redirect the thought processes. This will usually eventually require an eclectic approach to treatment rather than being content with the solution of an isolated problem.
This represents a challenge to me–often a very difficult challenge. It is this that I relish, especially when I think of the results when I can reach a successful conclusion in a "project." That will mean one more person will have come closer to a life of joy and peace of mind. Toward this cause I have dedicated my life.
(Notes taken from "Stress and Coping" (1995) by Lora Morrow)
Get your free CD on Conquering Stress Today! http://www.ConquerStressToday.info
Monday, August 30, 2010
Things like this, I wouldn't wish on an enemy, if I had one . . .
Hi friends,
Well, I told you a little about the dental problems I was going through. It only got worse. It all started when I was getting a root canal and a bunch of other work. During the process, the dentist fractured a nearby tooth. So I was faced with getting another root canal.
During the second one, they discovered an infection, so they could not fill the hole where they did the work. They prescribed me an antibiotic and some pain medicine, and I was to return last Thursday . . . let see, that would have been August 26.
However, on that day they found the infection had only become worse, so they still could not fill the tooth. They prescribed both a stronger antibiotic and a stronger pain medicine. (I took very little of the pain medicine because I want to remain mentally alert to take care of my own business.)
Well, today they finally filled the tooth. But I assure you, last week was not a lot of fun.
Anyway, it's over now (I certainly hope). Sorry about the dearth of entries in here over the last few days. Tomorrow, I anticipate that you will have a brand new blog post to read. I look forward to talking with you again.
- Lora
Get your free CD on Conquering Stress Today! http://www.ConquerStressToday.info
Well, I told you a little about the dental problems I was going through. It only got worse. It all started when I was getting a root canal and a bunch of other work. During the process, the dentist fractured a nearby tooth. So I was faced with getting another root canal.
During the second one, they discovered an infection, so they could not fill the hole where they did the work. They prescribed me an antibiotic and some pain medicine, and I was to return last Thursday . . . let see, that would have been August 26.
However, on that day they found the infection had only become worse, so they still could not fill the tooth. They prescribed both a stronger antibiotic and a stronger pain medicine. (I took very little of the pain medicine because I want to remain mentally alert to take care of my own business.)
Well, today they finally filled the tooth. But I assure you, last week was not a lot of fun.
Anyway, it's over now (I certainly hope). Sorry about the dearth of entries in here over the last few days. Tomorrow, I anticipate that you will have a brand new blog post to read. I look forward to talking with you again.
- Lora
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Friday, August 27, 2010
Lora Morrow, Where Have You Been?
Just wanted to enter a note of apology to those who have been reading my posts here. My dental problems lately have been severe and have caused me excruciating pain. I believe I have a high pain threshold, but this has been incredible at times. It just has been hard to do much.
In addition, I tried to get something done yesterday, but we had an ongoing series of thunderstorms throughout the day, so my computer was off and unplugged (can't afford a new one, if you get my drift).
I may or may not have a new post up today - I'm so far behind now that this is all I can promise. But I do hope to be back in the saddle next week and resume being the dependable Lora whom I hope you have come to know.
- lm
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In addition, I tried to get something done yesterday, but we had an ongoing series of thunderstorms throughout the day, so my computer was off and unplugged (can't afford a new one, if you get my drift).
I may or may not have a new post up today - I'm so far behind now that this is all I can promise. But I do hope to be back in the saddle next week and resume being the dependable Lora whom I hope you have come to know.
- lm
Get your free CD on Conquering Stress Today! http://www.ConquerStressToday.info
Monday, August 23, 2010
The Spirituality of Need
Interestingly, in psychological circles, "needs" are generally classified as physical. A need is any physical departure from the ideal value. The psychological result is a drive–an aroused state or urge that results from the need.
It would seem to me, however, that the classification of a basic need would depend on the context of its referral. In other words, are we referring to basic survival, or psychological or physiological health, or spiritual?
Many would take issue with this last item (spiritual), saying that it does not belong in psychology. One major psychological theorist, Abraham Maslow, however, seemed to have other ideas. Maslow took exception to how scientific issues have been "desacralized"–that is, all possibility of spiritual factors have been discounted and removed. This has, said Maslow, effectively "removed the emotion, joy, wonder awe, and rapture from their study in order to purify and objectify it"(1).
This is significant, coming from Maslow. His “Hierarchy of Needs” has become so legendary that it has set him up as a foremost authority in that area.
Yet it would seem that Maslow was somewhat remiss in his hierarchy in that he arranged these contexts in successive order, with the satisfaction of the more basic needs as prerequisites to the succeeding ones. He addressed hunger and thirst first, any other needs coming only after slaking them, which, taken generically, seems to reduce the human to the animalistic level. A pair of dogs will fight viciously over a bone, but would a balanced human sacrifice a true friendship for a meal?
Along the same lines, love is placed after safety. Yet what truly devoted parent would not throw him- or herself in front of a truck (figuratively or literally) to save his or her child? Of course, we could have a transference of need here, as it were, where the parent is now concerned with the safety of the child, but, in such a case, did not love precede that concern?
In this area, another theorist, Carl Rogers, would seem to have provided better general coverage since individual attitudes and approaches depend on "how we perceive and understand the world and ourselves"(2). Nonetheless, Maslow’s attention to detail picks up where Rogers leaves off.
I believe the most important inference that can be drawn from the works of Maslow and Rogers is the basic difference between animals and humans: that of the abstract levels of thought and behavior. The animal’s quest for satisfaction is generally species-specific (instinctual). The human, while having some of the same species-specific tendencies, must rely on more cognitive choices, or those that involve the processes of abstract thinking.
It is through making proper decisions that the human arrives at satisfying needs on all levels. Or, as my dear grandfather said, “Make the right choices, good things happen. Make the wrong choices, bad things happen. There is no gray area."
On the human level, it involves the ability to grasp hold of the concepts that make us what and who we are. Without this, our human needs, which transcend those of animals, will never be met. And this is where the spritual aspect comes in.
1. Maslow, A. H. (1970). Motivation and personality (2nd ed.). New York: Harper & Row, page 514.
2. Atkinson, R. L., Atkinson, R. C. , Smith, E. E., & Hilgard, E. R. (1987). Introduction to psychology (9th ed.). Orlando, FL: Harcourt Brace Jovanovich, page 435.
(Taken from “Needs,” 2002, by Lora Morrow.)
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It would seem to me, however, that the classification of a basic need would depend on the context of its referral. In other words, are we referring to basic survival, or psychological or physiological health, or spiritual?
Many would take issue with this last item (spiritual), saying that it does not belong in psychology. One major psychological theorist, Abraham Maslow, however, seemed to have other ideas. Maslow took exception to how scientific issues have been "desacralized"–that is, all possibility of spiritual factors have been discounted and removed. This has, said Maslow, effectively "removed the emotion, joy, wonder awe, and rapture from their study in order to purify and objectify it"(1).
This is significant, coming from Maslow. His “Hierarchy of Needs” has become so legendary that it has set him up as a foremost authority in that area.
Yet it would seem that Maslow was somewhat remiss in his hierarchy in that he arranged these contexts in successive order, with the satisfaction of the more basic needs as prerequisites to the succeeding ones. He addressed hunger and thirst first, any other needs coming only after slaking them, which, taken generically, seems to reduce the human to the animalistic level. A pair of dogs will fight viciously over a bone, but would a balanced human sacrifice a true friendship for a meal?
Along the same lines, love is placed after safety. Yet what truly devoted parent would not throw him- or herself in front of a truck (figuratively or literally) to save his or her child? Of course, we could have a transference of need here, as it were, where the parent is now concerned with the safety of the child, but, in such a case, did not love precede that concern?
In this area, another theorist, Carl Rogers, would seem to have provided better general coverage since individual attitudes and approaches depend on "how we perceive and understand the world and ourselves"(2). Nonetheless, Maslow’s attention to detail picks up where Rogers leaves off.
I believe the most important inference that can be drawn from the works of Maslow and Rogers is the basic difference between animals and humans: that of the abstract levels of thought and behavior. The animal’s quest for satisfaction is generally species-specific (instinctual). The human, while having some of the same species-specific tendencies, must rely on more cognitive choices, or those that involve the processes of abstract thinking.
It is through making proper decisions that the human arrives at satisfying needs on all levels. Or, as my dear grandfather said, “Make the right choices, good things happen. Make the wrong choices, bad things happen. There is no gray area."
On the human level, it involves the ability to grasp hold of the concepts that make us what and who we are. Without this, our human needs, which transcend those of animals, will never be met. And this is where the spritual aspect comes in.
1. Maslow, A. H. (1970). Motivation and personality (2nd ed.). New York: Harper & Row, page 514.
2. Atkinson, R. L., Atkinson, R. C. , Smith, E. E., & Hilgard, E. R. (1987). Introduction to psychology (9th ed.). Orlando, FL: Harcourt Brace Jovanovich, page 435.
(Taken from “Needs,” 2002, by Lora Morrow.)
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Wednesday, August 18, 2010
Take Control of Your Personality . . .
You cannot make yourself taller, but you can develop a better personality. Personality involves the interaction of three factors: (1) habits, (2) traits, and (3) attitudes.
• A habit is something one does over and over again.
• A trait is a tendency to do something repeatedly in a similar way. For example, a person may have a trait of being untidy.
• An attitude is a way of looking at something—life, love, relationships.
For the same reason that habits, traits, and attitudes are learned and acquired, they can also be altered or eliminated. And undesirable habits can be unlearned.
To change for the better, you must be convinced beyond all doubt that you can change, that you can learn to become less hostile and aggressive—or shy—and to overcome emotional handicaps. This conviction must be your starting point in your self-improvement program.
You must want to change. Many individuals have no incentive to improve themselves only because they were born into a neurotic home and were exposed to the incompatibility of unhappy parents.
Or they feel trapped in an unhealthy illness. They take a "what’s the use" attitude. They have self-defeating personalities. You must want to change for your own sake, rather than for someone else. To use an extreme example for illustrative purposes, say, a woman refuses to go anywhere alone because she has epileptic seizures. While this woman uses her epilepsy as an excuse to hide away, she remains unhealthy and depressed.
Likewise, not to improve because you feel it won’t be appreciated by someone else is fatal to growth and progress. You must reward yourself through accomplishments. You must develop a sense of pride, a feeling of worthiness and self-satisfaction that enables you to face the future with increasing self-confidence.
No one can deny there is an advantage to having someone to encourage you, someone who loves you and has a genuine desire to help you make progress in life. Such an advantage will naturally make it easier for you to attain your individual goals in life.
Yet you do not necessarily need this outside encouragement to bring about self-improvement. Nothing can stand in your way if you are determined. What you must do is to concentrate on changing and improving yourself every single day.
You will be amazed at the ease with which you will transform your personality and become the kind of person you want to be if you put into practice the suggestions that have been given to you. The time to start is now!
Some Pointers That Will Make a Difference in Your Life:
• Make a list of affirmations, those that you want to change that apply to your inter-self. Repeat the affirmations twice daily, using the relaxation techniques in my Positive Personal Modification Therapy.
• Take time to breath deeply and relax. This may seem a repetition of above, but what I am saying here is to make time to do it.
• Pay close attention to the positive things in life.
• Put your heart and trust in everything you do. With this attitude, you will do at least one good deed each day.
Become the best that you can be. Reward yourself for the growth taking place in you. It is your dedication and your belief that is making this all possible. Be proud and happy for the life you have chosen to lead . . . with control.
(Taken from "Cultivating a New Personality," 2002, by Lora Morrow)
Get your free CD on Conquering Stress Today! http://www.ConquerStressToday.info
• A habit is something one does over and over again.
• A trait is a tendency to do something repeatedly in a similar way. For example, a person may have a trait of being untidy.
• An attitude is a way of looking at something—life, love, relationships.
For the same reason that habits, traits, and attitudes are learned and acquired, they can also be altered or eliminated. And undesirable habits can be unlearned.
To change for the better, you must be convinced beyond all doubt that you can change, that you can learn to become less hostile and aggressive—or shy—and to overcome emotional handicaps. This conviction must be your starting point in your self-improvement program.
You must want to change. Many individuals have no incentive to improve themselves only because they were born into a neurotic home and were exposed to the incompatibility of unhappy parents.
Or they feel trapped in an unhealthy illness. They take a "what’s the use" attitude. They have self-defeating personalities. You must want to change for your own sake, rather than for someone else. To use an extreme example for illustrative purposes, say, a woman refuses to go anywhere alone because she has epileptic seizures. While this woman uses her epilepsy as an excuse to hide away, she remains unhealthy and depressed.
Likewise, not to improve because you feel it won’t be appreciated by someone else is fatal to growth and progress. You must reward yourself through accomplishments. You must develop a sense of pride, a feeling of worthiness and self-satisfaction that enables you to face the future with increasing self-confidence.
No one can deny there is an advantage to having someone to encourage you, someone who loves you and has a genuine desire to help you make progress in life. Such an advantage will naturally make it easier for you to attain your individual goals in life.
Yet you do not necessarily need this outside encouragement to bring about self-improvement. Nothing can stand in your way if you are determined. What you must do is to concentrate on changing and improving yourself every single day.
You will be amazed at the ease with which you will transform your personality and become the kind of person you want to be if you put into practice the suggestions that have been given to you. The time to start is now!
Some Pointers That Will Make a Difference in Your Life:
• Make a list of affirmations, those that you want to change that apply to your inter-self. Repeat the affirmations twice daily, using the relaxation techniques in my Positive Personal Modification Therapy.
• Take time to breath deeply and relax. This may seem a repetition of above, but what I am saying here is to make time to do it.
• Pay close attention to the positive things in life.
• Put your heart and trust in everything you do. With this attitude, you will do at least one good deed each day.
Become the best that you can be. Reward yourself for the growth taking place in you. It is your dedication and your belief that is making this all possible. Be proud and happy for the life you have chosen to lead . . . with control.
(Taken from "Cultivating a New Personality," 2002, by Lora Morrow)
Get your free CD on Conquering Stress Today! http://www.ConquerStressToday.info
Tuesday, August 17, 2010
Why Do We Have Problems?
Why are there so many problems in life? Why have so many things gone wrong? Believe it or not, we are supposed to have problems—life would not be normal without them!
Have you ever had the feeling that the reason you were born was for the purpose of being nature’s punching bag? This can be asked as a generic, rhetorical question because nearly, if not absolutely, everyone has had these thoughts at sometime in his or her life, probably more than once. But this is not so; in fact, it is one of the excuses we can catch ourselves repeating to ourselves.
Take a look around you. Look at the people driving their cars up and down the streets. Look at the homes in your neighborhood and imagine the people residing in them, at the shoppers in the stores and others at work there and in other workplaces. What are they doing? Of course, if the answer involves their tasks at hand, a different answer can be offered for each individual.
Yet the true answer can be conveyed in one simple statement: All these people and all others—whatever their tasks at hand—are solving problems.
Think about it. Nearly everything you do—every simple chore, or even unconscious move you make—is to solve a problem.
You pick up milk at the local convenience store. Problem: You are about to run out of milk at home, which means no cereal, no milk for the kids to drink with their afternoon snack, and whatever else you use it for. You pick up a pen to write. Problem: the pen is not in your hand in the position to perform that function.
This is the point: Whatever you choose to do in life, wherever you go, in whatever circumstances you find yourself, you where born to solve problems.
Only the strong survive. What does it take to be strong? A heart that will not quit? A strong constitution? Certainly, those factors can help. But in these days of relentless emotional and psychological pressures- when stress is blamed for every malady from chronic depression to cancer, - there emerge some new strength factors. Once you have come to the conclusion that problems are not bad and view them as challenges, then you are in control.
You need to believe in yourself. Worry and self-criticism are mentally fatiguing. Give yourself pep talks, and make sure you are satisfied with your live and actions. Reflect on your mission in life. Who and what are most important to you? When you have a strong sense of inner direction, you will bring more energy to everything you do. Change can do the body some good. To unlearn the constrained way of living your life...and to expose yourself to variety, stimulating alternatives and change. Being able to focus on the positive aspects of change- the opportunities and fresh energy that result from change.
You can overcome many defeating problems by concentrating on the present rather than dwelling on the past or worrying about the future. The present is the only moment during which you can experience happiness-or misery- and the only moment which you have any control. It is important to understand that feelings are reactions over which you have control. You choose your thoughts, and you are the sum total of these choices. You need to take charge of your emotions by choosing the thoughts to which you react.
Oh, and one more thing: I am going to be so presumptuous here as to suggest that heartfelt prayer can work wonders in these situations . . .
Get your free CD on Conquering Stress Today! http://www.ConquerStressToday.info
Have you ever had the feeling that the reason you were born was for the purpose of being nature’s punching bag? This can be asked as a generic, rhetorical question because nearly, if not absolutely, everyone has had these thoughts at sometime in his or her life, probably more than once. But this is not so; in fact, it is one of the excuses we can catch ourselves repeating to ourselves.
Take a look around you. Look at the people driving their cars up and down the streets. Look at the homes in your neighborhood and imagine the people residing in them, at the shoppers in the stores and others at work there and in other workplaces. What are they doing? Of course, if the answer involves their tasks at hand, a different answer can be offered for each individual.
Yet the true answer can be conveyed in one simple statement: All these people and all others—whatever their tasks at hand—are solving problems.
Think about it. Nearly everything you do—every simple chore, or even unconscious move you make—is to solve a problem.
You pick up milk at the local convenience store. Problem: You are about to run out of milk at home, which means no cereal, no milk for the kids to drink with their afternoon snack, and whatever else you use it for. You pick up a pen to write. Problem: the pen is not in your hand in the position to perform that function.
This is the point: Whatever you choose to do in life, wherever you go, in whatever circumstances you find yourself, you where born to solve problems.
Only the strong survive. What does it take to be strong? A heart that will not quit? A strong constitution? Certainly, those factors can help. But in these days of relentless emotional and psychological pressures- when stress is blamed for every malady from chronic depression to cancer, - there emerge some new strength factors. Once you have come to the conclusion that problems are not bad and view them as challenges, then you are in control.
You need to believe in yourself. Worry and self-criticism are mentally fatiguing. Give yourself pep talks, and make sure you are satisfied with your live and actions. Reflect on your mission in life. Who and what are most important to you? When you have a strong sense of inner direction, you will bring more energy to everything you do. Change can do the body some good. To unlearn the constrained way of living your life...and to expose yourself to variety, stimulating alternatives and change. Being able to focus on the positive aspects of change- the opportunities and fresh energy that result from change.
You can overcome many defeating problems by concentrating on the present rather than dwelling on the past or worrying about the future. The present is the only moment during which you can experience happiness-or misery- and the only moment which you have any control. It is important to understand that feelings are reactions over which you have control. You choose your thoughts, and you are the sum total of these choices. You need to take charge of your emotions by choosing the thoughts to which you react.
Oh, and one more thing: I am going to be so presumptuous here as to suggest that heartfelt prayer can work wonders in these situations . . .
Get your free CD on Conquering Stress Today! http://www.ConquerStressToday.info
Friday, August 13, 2010
Cultivate Your Higher Self . . .
You can overcome self-defeating behavior by concentrating on the present rather than dwelling on the past or worrying about the future. The present is the only moment during which you can experience happiness—or misery—and the only moment over which you have any control.
The higher self promotes the feeling of peace. The higher self wants you to enjoy rather than strive endlessly . . . to relate honestly with others . . . to feel connected by love, rather than separated by fear. By listening to your higher self, you will have more power: You will be free to choose intelligently and to see more confidently.
Four Steps to Higher Self
1) Shut down your inner dialogue. It has been estimated that we think 60,000 thoughts each day. The trouble is, most of them are pretty much the same thoughts we had yesterday. Just below this constant stream of chatter in your brain is a space of calm and quiet. You don’t have to go into a cave and meditate to connect with this quiet space. You can do it anywhere.
* Strategy: Take a moment of silence—a break from this barrage of thoughts. As my long-time clients already know, adding a few deep breaths can work wonders.
* Ideal: Most effective would be to take a ten-minute walk if you can. Here is a key: While walking, cast your eyes upward. If it is a clear day, and let them soak in the deep, peaceful blue of the sky God gave us. As calm returns, you will again become aware of the thoughts as they pass through your mind, and the space between the thoughts. Your pulse will slow, your blood pressure will drop. You will feel relaxed and will begin to take charge of your emotions.
2) Banish your doubts. To eliminate doubt, recognize the difference between what you believe and what you know–that is, between beliefs and knowledge.
* Beliefs: These are opinions handed to you by other people or by assumptions you make from events in your environment. It is important to realize that, whatever your objective in life, these beliefs, without substantial support from the facts, won’t get you there. Such a belief is a guess, and there is doubt associated with a guess because it comes from outside you.
* Knowledge: This is the opposite of doubt. What you know comes from within. That is, it comes from your direct experience. Some knowledge, of course, has to come from other sources. But much of the knowledge about yourself comes from yourself.
3) Cultivate the witness in you. There are two people living within you: (1) one who thinks, moves and acts, and (2) an innermost self that just observes, allowing you to study yourself objectively.
* Strategy: Learn to step outside yourself by using visualization. Instead of being completely absorbed in everything that is happening to you, try to cultivate the part of you that stands a little apart from the rest of you.
4) Tame your ego. By taming your ego, you will experience that higher self that deserves love, and good health. With nothing to prove, you won’t particularly need approval.
* Strategies: Work at not being offended and allow other people to be who they actually are. Strive for tolerance rather than dominance, and you will be in peace rather than turmoil. Practice the highest level of heightened awareness—being independent of the good opinion of other people.
When you have the choice between being right or being kind, always pause long enough to judge whether it would be better to be kind. Letting go of your need to be accepted, and of the tendency to judge others for not knowing, can dramatically transform your well being.
Happiness is possible only if you take charge of your inner feelings and evict your negative thoughts to make room for positive thoughts. Only then will you add to your peace of mind.
Get your free CD on Conquering Stress Today! http://www.ConquerStressToday.info
The higher self promotes the feeling of peace. The higher self wants you to enjoy rather than strive endlessly . . . to relate honestly with others . . . to feel connected by love, rather than separated by fear. By listening to your higher self, you will have more power: You will be free to choose intelligently and to see more confidently.
Four Steps to Higher Self
1) Shut down your inner dialogue. It has been estimated that we think 60,000 thoughts each day. The trouble is, most of them are pretty much the same thoughts we had yesterday. Just below this constant stream of chatter in your brain is a space of calm and quiet. You don’t have to go into a cave and meditate to connect with this quiet space. You can do it anywhere.
* Strategy: Take a moment of silence—a break from this barrage of thoughts. As my long-time clients already know, adding a few deep breaths can work wonders.
* Ideal: Most effective would be to take a ten-minute walk if you can. Here is a key: While walking, cast your eyes upward. If it is a clear day, and let them soak in the deep, peaceful blue of the sky God gave us. As calm returns, you will again become aware of the thoughts as they pass through your mind, and the space between the thoughts. Your pulse will slow, your blood pressure will drop. You will feel relaxed and will begin to take charge of your emotions.
2) Banish your doubts. To eliminate doubt, recognize the difference between what you believe and what you know–that is, between beliefs and knowledge.
* Beliefs: These are opinions handed to you by other people or by assumptions you make from events in your environment. It is important to realize that, whatever your objective in life, these beliefs, without substantial support from the facts, won’t get you there. Such a belief is a guess, and there is doubt associated with a guess because it comes from outside you.
* Knowledge: This is the opposite of doubt. What you know comes from within. That is, it comes from your direct experience. Some knowledge, of course, has to come from other sources. But much of the knowledge about yourself comes from yourself.
3) Cultivate the witness in you. There are two people living within you: (1) one who thinks, moves and acts, and (2) an innermost self that just observes, allowing you to study yourself objectively.
* Strategy: Learn to step outside yourself by using visualization. Instead of being completely absorbed in everything that is happening to you, try to cultivate the part of you that stands a little apart from the rest of you.
4) Tame your ego. By taming your ego, you will experience that higher self that deserves love, and good health. With nothing to prove, you won’t particularly need approval.
* Strategies: Work at not being offended and allow other people to be who they actually are. Strive for tolerance rather than dominance, and you will be in peace rather than turmoil. Practice the highest level of heightened awareness—being independent of the good opinion of other people.
When you have the choice between being right or being kind, always pause long enough to judge whether it would be better to be kind. Letting go of your need to be accepted, and of the tendency to judge others for not knowing, can dramatically transform your well being.
Happiness is possible only if you take charge of your inner feelings and evict your negative thoughts to make room for positive thoughts. Only then will you add to your peace of mind.
Get your free CD on Conquering Stress Today! http://www.ConquerStressToday.info
Thursday, August 12, 2010
Honesty and the Power of Prosperity: Random Notes
We have power within us that is capable of bringing our fondest dreams to reality and providing enormous wealth. The problem is, we are not open to receiving it. If we want something, our subconscious mind does not say, "I’ll think about it." It readily responds and sends it through, and we have to be ready for it. If we aren’t, it goes back into the storehouse of unfulfilled desires.
Many clients have come to see me, only to sit with their arms folded across their bodies. I think, "How are they going to let anything in?" It is a wonderful symbolic gesture to open our arms wide so the universe notices and responds. For some, this is very scary because if they open themselves up they think terrible things will happen; and they probably will, until they change whatever is inside them that attracts all their doom and gloom.
Accepting Prosperity
When we use the term prosperity, many people immediately think of money. However, there are other concepts of prosperity: for example, time, love, success, comfort, the beauty from within, knowledge, relationships, and good health.
If you are feeling rushed because there is not enough time to do everything you want, then you have lack of time. If you feel that success is beyond your reach, then you are not going to get it. If you feel life is burdensome, then you will always feel uncomfortable. If you feel a lack of love and have poor relationships, then it will be difficult for you to attract love into your life.
None of the above has anything to do with receiving. So many think, oh I want to get this or that. But abundance and prosperity is about allowing yourself to accept. When you are not getting what you want, on some level you are not allowing yourself to accept it. If we steal from life, life will steal from us.
Being Honest With Ourselves
How often do we hear the word honesty? How many understand the true significance of what it means to be honest? Honesty is an act of love toward ourselves.
The main value of honesty is that whatever we give out in life we will get back. The law of cause and effect is always operating on all levels. If we belittle or judge others, then we, too, are judged. If we are always angry, then we encounter anger wherever we go. The love we have for ourselves keeps us in tune with the love life has for us.
For instance, imagine that you applied for a job you really wanted and did not get it. Does it make you feel like a victim? Certain questions would probably arise: Why wasn’t I hired? Who did this to me? It is a bad feeling when something like that happens. But do you stop to think how and why you may have attracted such an experience?
Taking responsibility for creating our own experiences is not an idea that many of us accept all the time, and, for some of us, not even some of the time. It is so much easier to blame something outside ourselves, yet our spiritual growth cannot occur until we recognize that there is little of value outside of us in this area—everything must come from within.
Negative beliefs are not the truth of our being. We are magnificent creations of God, and we have the right to earn the very best, and we were given an abundantly plentiful planet on which to do it.
Our good always comes to us by the right of consciousness—making the right choices and implementing them. The work we do in consciousness is always one of refining what we say, think, and do. When we clearly understand that our thoughts create our reality, then we use our reality as feedback mechanism to let us know what we need to change next.
This is what is meant by being honest. Being absolutely honest, down to the last paper clip, is a choice we make out of love for ourselves because honesty helps to make our lives run more smoothly and more easily.
Get your free CD on Conquering Stress Today! http://www.ConquerStressToday.info
Many clients have come to see me, only to sit with their arms folded across their bodies. I think, "How are they going to let anything in?" It is a wonderful symbolic gesture to open our arms wide so the universe notices and responds. For some, this is very scary because if they open themselves up they think terrible things will happen; and they probably will, until they change whatever is inside them that attracts all their doom and gloom.
Accepting Prosperity
When we use the term prosperity, many people immediately think of money. However, there are other concepts of prosperity: for example, time, love, success, comfort, the beauty from within, knowledge, relationships, and good health.
If you are feeling rushed because there is not enough time to do everything you want, then you have lack of time. If you feel that success is beyond your reach, then you are not going to get it. If you feel life is burdensome, then you will always feel uncomfortable. If you feel a lack of love and have poor relationships, then it will be difficult for you to attract love into your life.
None of the above has anything to do with receiving. So many think, oh I want to get this or that. But abundance and prosperity is about allowing yourself to accept. When you are not getting what you want, on some level you are not allowing yourself to accept it. If we steal from life, life will steal from us.
Being Honest With Ourselves
How often do we hear the word honesty? How many understand the true significance of what it means to be honest? Honesty is an act of love toward ourselves.
The main value of honesty is that whatever we give out in life we will get back. The law of cause and effect is always operating on all levels. If we belittle or judge others, then we, too, are judged. If we are always angry, then we encounter anger wherever we go. The love we have for ourselves keeps us in tune with the love life has for us.
For instance, imagine that you applied for a job you really wanted and did not get it. Does it make you feel like a victim? Certain questions would probably arise: Why wasn’t I hired? Who did this to me? It is a bad feeling when something like that happens. But do you stop to think how and why you may have attracted such an experience?
Taking responsibility for creating our own experiences is not an idea that many of us accept all the time, and, for some of us, not even some of the time. It is so much easier to blame something outside ourselves, yet our spiritual growth cannot occur until we recognize that there is little of value outside of us in this area—everything must come from within.
Negative beliefs are not the truth of our being. We are magnificent creations of God, and we have the right to earn the very best, and we were given an abundantly plentiful planet on which to do it.
Our good always comes to us by the right of consciousness—making the right choices and implementing them. The work we do in consciousness is always one of refining what we say, think, and do. When we clearly understand that our thoughts create our reality, then we use our reality as feedback mechanism to let us know what we need to change next.
This is what is meant by being honest. Being absolutely honest, down to the last paper clip, is a choice we make out of love for ourselves because honesty helps to make our lives run more smoothly and more easily.
Get your free CD on Conquering Stress Today! http://www.ConquerStressToday.info
Wednesday, August 11, 2010
The Critical Need for Oral Hygiene . . .
I apologize to my followers for the absence of posts these last few days. Ironically, I have been going through some dental problems and subsequent treatments, which actually incited this one.
~~~~~
Most of us know that it is important to get a yearly medical check up. However, many neglect to do this. It may be due to fear, the expense, or lack of time. Whatever the excuse, a lot of things are happening in our bodies that go undetected. The more time it lingers on, the more difficult, and time consuming it can become to take care of it.
We might think, and or feel the importance of that doctors visit, or test but we procrastinate to get in there and do it.
Oral hygiene is even worse. Most don't even think about getting one's dental work updated as we should. A small percentage of us realize how much our oral hygiene plays on the rest of our bodies. There are gum diseases, not just gingivitis but periodontitis. Conditions such as heart disease, respiratory disease, stroke, and diabetes are associated with systemic periodontitis. The scary thing is that most don't even know they have such a disease.
Going to the dentist can be costly, and few have adequate insurance in this area. But it can save your life, or at least get to a health issue before becoming chronic. Without good health, what else is left?
By having your mouth checked, you might even eliminate many other factors that might contribute to allergies, and migraines. This might even improve results in the treatments one might be going through for many other illnesses.
Think about it . . .
Get your free CD on Conquering Stress Today! http://www.ConquerStressToday.info
~~~~~
Most of us know that it is important to get a yearly medical check up. However, many neglect to do this. It may be due to fear, the expense, or lack of time. Whatever the excuse, a lot of things are happening in our bodies that go undetected. The more time it lingers on, the more difficult, and time consuming it can become to take care of it.
We might think, and or feel the importance of that doctors visit, or test but we procrastinate to get in there and do it.
Oral hygiene is even worse. Most don't even think about getting one's dental work updated as we should. A small percentage of us realize how much our oral hygiene plays on the rest of our bodies. There are gum diseases, not just gingivitis but periodontitis. Conditions such as heart disease, respiratory disease, stroke, and diabetes are associated with systemic periodontitis. The scary thing is that most don't even know they have such a disease.
Going to the dentist can be costly, and few have adequate insurance in this area. But it can save your life, or at least get to a health issue before becoming chronic. Without good health, what else is left?
By having your mouth checked, you might even eliminate many other factors that might contribute to allergies, and migraines. This might even improve results in the treatments one might be going through for many other illnesses.
Think about it . . .
Get your free CD on Conquering Stress Today! http://www.ConquerStressToday.info
Thursday, August 5, 2010
Shame and Anxiety Are Entwined
Shame is a sense of deficit in the self. Feelings of shame and humiliation are emotional states that require considerable self-evaluation. All these processes concern our social nature. We can distinguish between an aggressive social tendency, in which an individual, in striving to achieve his aims, is not concerned about damaging other people (and indeed may tend to damage others); and an adoptive social tendency, in which the individual may seek the approval of and partnership with others.
Humans project various images of themselves, depending what is most useful in particular circumstances, and for whom those images are intended. An image of appeasement and nonaggression toward a possible partner in the act of courtship may be combined with an aggressive or combative image when in the face of a rival or when it is important to mark one’s territory. Within certain limits, the representation of shame, therefore, comes to be a means of communicating an image that influences relations with others.
Shame is about the self, which is the self only by virtue of confirmation, recognition, affirmation, and perhaps empathic understanding from others. The self-conscious awareness that selfhood is contingent on other people’s opinions and the possibility of failure or rejection gives rise to shame.
Shame (and guilt, which may or may not be synonomous) is a state of anxiety. There is a fundamental difference between ordinary emotion and the state of anxiety. While emotions generically supports intellectual activity, anxiety erodes it. Through the environment and our interpretation of it, we create our world in our image of ourselves and ourselves in that image of our world. But the images we create are never completely secure: Anxiety is both a sign and a result of emotional collapse.
Get your free CD on Conquering Stress Today! http://www.ConquerStressToday.info
Humans project various images of themselves, depending what is most useful in particular circumstances, and for whom those images are intended. An image of appeasement and nonaggression toward a possible partner in the act of courtship may be combined with an aggressive or combative image when in the face of a rival or when it is important to mark one’s territory. Within certain limits, the representation of shame, therefore, comes to be a means of communicating an image that influences relations with others.
Shame is about the self, which is the self only by virtue of confirmation, recognition, affirmation, and perhaps empathic understanding from others. The self-conscious awareness that selfhood is contingent on other people’s opinions and the possibility of failure or rejection gives rise to shame.
Shame (and guilt, which may or may not be synonomous) is a state of anxiety. There is a fundamental difference between ordinary emotion and the state of anxiety. While emotions generically supports intellectual activity, anxiety erodes it. Through the environment and our interpretation of it, we create our world in our image of ourselves and ourselves in that image of our world. But the images we create are never completely secure: Anxiety is both a sign and a result of emotional collapse.
Get your free CD on Conquering Stress Today! http://www.ConquerStressToday.info
Friday, July 30, 2010
Medical Treatment and the Belief System . . .
A medical patient’s attitude is so important to surgeons that many of them will delay a major operation until they become convinced that the patient is reasonably optimistic about the outcome. A negative attitude, coming from the sense of helplessness, in its most severe forms, can lead to tragic consequences. There have been many cases of "unexplained" deaths of people who believed themselves in hopeless circumstances.
The placebo effect can work in the reverse. In some cases, for example, persons have died after ingesting toxic substances that were otherwise often too small even to make them sick. In addition, numerous studies have shown a marked correspondence between increased health problems and the amount of stress from multiple life changes (for example, unemployment, relocation, bereavement, divorce, death in the family). Such health effects are much more prominent among persons already having low self-esteem.
What is surprising is that dramatic events even on the good side can have harmful effects on people not expecting them, What can overtax a body's defensive resources, then, is the amount of adjustment following change, or the interpretation of stressors, or environmental or internal factors that aggravate stress levels within an individual.
The point is that patient does not always have a realistic grasp in the actual physical condition. Therefore, one's perception can actually be altered by one's belief system.
Without the proper concept of reality, effective treatment may become difficult. As I mentioned, this means the proper optimism as well as overcoming any denial. Because I believe that stress, or more properly the interpretation of stressors, is the most influential factor on health, the patient must master these techniques before going on to others. The others, then, will be addressed accordingly, such as deciding on a purpose in life, educating oneself in the disease that afflicts, diet, etc.
Get your free CD on Conquering Stress Today! http://www.ConquerStressToday.info
The placebo effect can work in the reverse. In some cases, for example, persons have died after ingesting toxic substances that were otherwise often too small even to make them sick. In addition, numerous studies have shown a marked correspondence between increased health problems and the amount of stress from multiple life changes (for example, unemployment, relocation, bereavement, divorce, death in the family). Such health effects are much more prominent among persons already having low self-esteem.
What is surprising is that dramatic events even on the good side can have harmful effects on people not expecting them, What can overtax a body's defensive resources, then, is the amount of adjustment following change, or the interpretation of stressors, or environmental or internal factors that aggravate stress levels within an individual.
The point is that patient does not always have a realistic grasp in the actual physical condition. Therefore, one's perception can actually be altered by one's belief system.
Without the proper concept of reality, effective treatment may become difficult. As I mentioned, this means the proper optimism as well as overcoming any denial. Because I believe that stress, or more properly the interpretation of stressors, is the most influential factor on health, the patient must master these techniques before going on to others. The others, then, will be addressed accordingly, such as deciding on a purpose in life, educating oneself in the disease that afflicts, diet, etc.
Get your free CD on Conquering Stress Today! http://www.ConquerStressToday.info
Wednesday, July 28, 2010
Chronic Illness and Stress
Studies have shown that patients with chronic illnesses as a group experience worse social and physical functioning and poorer mental health than those who do not have chronic illnesses. Medical treatment itself can be disrupted as the patient’s frustration and feelings of hopelessness induce doubt toward the health care providers and resistance toward treatment regimens.
Anxieties resulting from chronic illnesses are largely products of automatic thoughts. They are not necessarily conscious thoughts of which the patient is aware. These thoughts involve how the patient is thinking toward the illness or pain itself, how he should respond to it, and toward the patient’s anticipation of how others view him. The most common thoughts can include denial, resignation, panic, rebellion, and feelings of being a social outcast.
The nature of anxiety can vary with the age of the patient. For instance, teenagers deal with such the treatment will affect their appearance and athletic abilities. They also face issues of real or perceived dependence and relationships with peers.
Adults, conversely, are more affected by their present self-esteem and understanding of their strengths and weaknesses, as well as their sense of control over their own destinies.
Different forms of illnesses can cause varying types of anxieties, especially involving causes. For instance, while sickle cell anemia is inherited and the cause of Crohn’s disease is largely unknown, three of the four top causes of HIV are based on behaviors. According to The American Medical Association Encyclopedia of Medicine, these four, in order of occurrence, are (1) male homosexual activity, (2) needle sharing by drug abusers, (3) receiving infected blood or blood product transfusions, and (4) male to female sexual transmission.
The first two listed (sickle cell and Crohn’s), then, would cause anxieties such as those already mentioned, but HIV patients may incur added anxieties from anger toward whoever passed it to them and possibly toward themselves for not implementing greater self-protection.
The patient’s environment bears so much impact on the patient’s mental state that it cannot be ignored in addressing his anxiety. Family members may also experience such emotions as guilt, anger, sadness, fear, as well as anxiety and depression. Moreover, the patient’s own view of his problems may differ according to his specific environment.
This can create vicious cyles: that is, the illness can aggravate the patient’s stress, and then the stress aggravates the illness. In addition, those involved in the patient’s life are also affected, and their reactions in turn fuel the anxieties in the patient.
There is hope, but it seldom can be found by just “dealing with it.” That sort of approach is addressing only the symptoms–and the stress and anxiety themselves are only symptoms, not causes. The need for professional help in such cases is almost certain. But without aggressively addressing it, the stress and anxiety accompanying the illness will almost certainly continue.
Start by getting my free CD on Conquering Stress Today. This will give you a head start on the decisions you need to make. Just go to http://www.ConquerStressToday.info
Anxieties resulting from chronic illnesses are largely products of automatic thoughts. They are not necessarily conscious thoughts of which the patient is aware. These thoughts involve how the patient is thinking toward the illness or pain itself, how he should respond to it, and toward the patient’s anticipation of how others view him. The most common thoughts can include denial, resignation, panic, rebellion, and feelings of being a social outcast.
The nature of anxiety can vary with the age of the patient. For instance, teenagers deal with such the treatment will affect their appearance and athletic abilities. They also face issues of real or perceived dependence and relationships with peers.
Adults, conversely, are more affected by their present self-esteem and understanding of their strengths and weaknesses, as well as their sense of control over their own destinies.
Different forms of illnesses can cause varying types of anxieties, especially involving causes. For instance, while sickle cell anemia is inherited and the cause of Crohn’s disease is largely unknown, three of the four top causes of HIV are based on behaviors. According to The American Medical Association Encyclopedia of Medicine, these four, in order of occurrence, are (1) male homosexual activity, (2) needle sharing by drug abusers, (3) receiving infected blood or blood product transfusions, and (4) male to female sexual transmission.
The first two listed (sickle cell and Crohn’s), then, would cause anxieties such as those already mentioned, but HIV patients may incur added anxieties from anger toward whoever passed it to them and possibly toward themselves for not implementing greater self-protection.
The patient’s environment bears so much impact on the patient’s mental state that it cannot be ignored in addressing his anxiety. Family members may also experience such emotions as guilt, anger, sadness, fear, as well as anxiety and depression. Moreover, the patient’s own view of his problems may differ according to his specific environment.
This can create vicious cyles: that is, the illness can aggravate the patient’s stress, and then the stress aggravates the illness. In addition, those involved in the patient’s life are also affected, and their reactions in turn fuel the anxieties in the patient.
There is hope, but it seldom can be found by just “dealing with it.” That sort of approach is addressing only the symptoms–and the stress and anxiety themselves are only symptoms, not causes. The need for professional help in such cases is almost certain. But without aggressively addressing it, the stress and anxiety accompanying the illness will almost certainly continue.
Start by getting my free CD on Conquering Stress Today. This will give you a head start on the decisions you need to make. Just go to http://www.ConquerStressToday.info
Monday, July 26, 2010
I found the following in the Disability Etiquette Handbook, published by The Baltimore County Commission on Disabilities. I hope they don't mind my posting it here, but I don't know how I could improve upon it:
People with disabilities face many barriers every day–from physical obstacles in buildings to systemic barriers in employment and civic programs. Yet, often, the most difficult barriers to overcome are attitudes other people carry regarding people with disabilities. Whether born from ignorance, fear, misunderstanding or hate, these attitudes keep people from appreciating–and experiencing–the full potential a person with a disability can achieve.
The most pervasive negative attitude is focusing on a person's disability rather than on an individual's abilities. A lawyer is effective if he or she has a solid grasp of law and can effectively advocate for his or her client; that the lawyer accesses law books through a Kurzweil reader because he or she is blind is immaterial to his or her ability to do a thorough job.
A rancher is effective if she or he feeds the cattle and mends the fences; that the rancher with paraplegia operates a cattle feeder system in the bed of a truck via a rod from the cab or rides an all-terrain vehicle to reach fences is immaterial to the job skill. A stocker in a factory is effective if he or she packages the proper number of items in each bin; that the stocker, because of a developmental disability that limits attention span, uses a counting device, is not only immaterial to the job skill, but can make–and has made–that person the most accurate stocker on the factory floor.
People with disabilities encounter many different forms of attitudinal barriers.
Inferiority: Because a person may be impaired in one of life's major functions, some people believe that that individual is a "second-class citizen." However, most people with disabilities have skills that make them valued employees.
Pity: People feel sorry for the person with a disability, who is considered a "victim." This tends to lead to patronizing attitudes. People with disabilities generally don't want pity and charity, just equal opportunity to earn their own way and live independently.
Hero worship: People sometimes consider someone with a disability to be brave or "special" for overcoming a disability. Sometimes the person with a disability is seen as "an inspiration" for the ways they live or work, in spite of the disability. But most people with disabilities do not want accolades for performing day-to-day tasks. The individual has simply learned to adapt by using his or her skills and knowledge, just as everybody adapts to obstacles to successful living and working.
Ignorance: People with disabilities are often dismissed as incapable of accomplishing a task without the opportunity to display their skills. Many people are not aware of what people with disabilities can do. People with disabilities can drive cars, work at jobs, and have families. People who are blind can tell time on a watch and visit museums. People who are deaf can play baseball and enjoy music. People with developmental disabilities can be creative and maintain strong work ethics.
The Spread Effect: People assume that an individual's disability negatively affects other senses, abilities or personality traits, or that the total person is impaired. For example, many people shout at people who are blind or don't expect people using wheelchairs to have the intelligence to speak for themselves. Focusing on the person's abilities rather than his or her disability counters this type of prejudice.
Stereotypes: The other side of the spread effect is the positive and negative generalizations people form about disabilities. For example, many believe that all people who are blind are great musicians or have a keener sense of smell and hearing, that all people who use wheelchairs are docile or compete in paralympics, that all people with developmental disabilities are innocent and sweet-natured, that all people with disabilities are sad and bitter. Aside from diminishing the individual and his or her abilities, such prejudice can set too high or too low a standard for individuals who are merely human.
Backlash: Many people believe individuals with disabilities are given unfair advantages, such as easier work requirements. Employers need to hold people with disabilities to the same job standards as co- workers, though the means of accomplishing those standards may differ from person to person. The Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA) does not require special privileges for people with disabilities, just equal opportunities.
Denial: Many disabilities are "hidden," such as learning disabilities, psychiatric disabilities, epilepsy, cancer, arthritis and heart conditions. Some people tend to believe that these are not bona fide disabilities needing accommodation. The ADA defines "disability" as an impairment that "substantially limits one or more of the major life activities." Accommodating "hidden" disabilities which meet the above definition can keep valued employees on the job and open doors for new employees.
Fear: Many people are afraid that they will "do or say the wrong thing" around someone with a disability. They therefore avert their own discomfort by avoiding the individual with a disability. As with becoming more comfortable with people from other cultures, frequent encounters can raise the comfort level.
Breaking Down Barriers: Unlike physical and systematic barriers, attitudinal barriers that often lead to illegal discrimination cannot be overcome simply through laws. The best remedy is familiarity, encouraging people with and without disabilities to relate to each other as co-workers, associates and social acquaintances. In time, most of the attitudes will give way to comfort, respect and friendship.
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People with disabilities face many barriers every day–from physical obstacles in buildings to systemic barriers in employment and civic programs. Yet, often, the most difficult barriers to overcome are attitudes other people carry regarding people with disabilities. Whether born from ignorance, fear, misunderstanding or hate, these attitudes keep people from appreciating–and experiencing–the full potential a person with a disability can achieve.
The most pervasive negative attitude is focusing on a person's disability rather than on an individual's abilities. A lawyer is effective if he or she has a solid grasp of law and can effectively advocate for his or her client; that the lawyer accesses law books through a Kurzweil reader because he or she is blind is immaterial to his or her ability to do a thorough job.
A rancher is effective if she or he feeds the cattle and mends the fences; that the rancher with paraplegia operates a cattle feeder system in the bed of a truck via a rod from the cab or rides an all-terrain vehicle to reach fences is immaterial to the job skill. A stocker in a factory is effective if he or she packages the proper number of items in each bin; that the stocker, because of a developmental disability that limits attention span, uses a counting device, is not only immaterial to the job skill, but can make–and has made–that person the most accurate stocker on the factory floor.
People with disabilities encounter many different forms of attitudinal barriers.
Inferiority: Because a person may be impaired in one of life's major functions, some people believe that that individual is a "second-class citizen." However, most people with disabilities have skills that make them valued employees.
Pity: People feel sorry for the person with a disability, who is considered a "victim." This tends to lead to patronizing attitudes. People with disabilities generally don't want pity and charity, just equal opportunity to earn their own way and live independently.
Hero worship: People sometimes consider someone with a disability to be brave or "special" for overcoming a disability. Sometimes the person with a disability is seen as "an inspiration" for the ways they live or work, in spite of the disability. But most people with disabilities do not want accolades for performing day-to-day tasks. The individual has simply learned to adapt by using his or her skills and knowledge, just as everybody adapts to obstacles to successful living and working.
Ignorance: People with disabilities are often dismissed as incapable of accomplishing a task without the opportunity to display their skills. Many people are not aware of what people with disabilities can do. People with disabilities can drive cars, work at jobs, and have families. People who are blind can tell time on a watch and visit museums. People who are deaf can play baseball and enjoy music. People with developmental disabilities can be creative and maintain strong work ethics.
The Spread Effect: People assume that an individual's disability negatively affects other senses, abilities or personality traits, or that the total person is impaired. For example, many people shout at people who are blind or don't expect people using wheelchairs to have the intelligence to speak for themselves. Focusing on the person's abilities rather than his or her disability counters this type of prejudice.
Stereotypes: The other side of the spread effect is the positive and negative generalizations people form about disabilities. For example, many believe that all people who are blind are great musicians or have a keener sense of smell and hearing, that all people who use wheelchairs are docile or compete in paralympics, that all people with developmental disabilities are innocent and sweet-natured, that all people with disabilities are sad and bitter. Aside from diminishing the individual and his or her abilities, such prejudice can set too high or too low a standard for individuals who are merely human.
Backlash: Many people believe individuals with disabilities are given unfair advantages, such as easier work requirements. Employers need to hold people with disabilities to the same job standards as co- workers, though the means of accomplishing those standards may differ from person to person. The Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA) does not require special privileges for people with disabilities, just equal opportunities.
Denial: Many disabilities are "hidden," such as learning disabilities, psychiatric disabilities, epilepsy, cancer, arthritis and heart conditions. Some people tend to believe that these are not bona fide disabilities needing accommodation. The ADA defines "disability" as an impairment that "substantially limits one or more of the major life activities." Accommodating "hidden" disabilities which meet the above definition can keep valued employees on the job and open doors for new employees.
Fear: Many people are afraid that they will "do or say the wrong thing" around someone with a disability. They therefore avert their own discomfort by avoiding the individual with a disability. As with becoming more comfortable with people from other cultures, frequent encounters can raise the comfort level.
Breaking Down Barriers: Unlike physical and systematic barriers, attitudinal barriers that often lead to illegal discrimination cannot be overcome simply through laws. The best remedy is familiarity, encouraging people with and without disabilities to relate to each other as co-workers, associates and social acquaintances. In time, most of the attitudes will give way to comfort, respect and friendship.
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